Private Practice

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Oh, Baby

The EXACT SAME THING is happening at the hospital, minus the wedding and happiness and flowers and taffeta. The mom holds her little boy and sings him a song and lets him go. I fucking hate this show and all its baby killing ways. Always makes me cry.

At the reception, Charlotte yells at Cooper and then they do it in the bathroom. And, rudely miss the toast that Sam struggled over. Actually, it's okay because the toast is sentimental and sappy and all about Maya as a little girl in another white dress saying she wanted to marry her daddy and, like, who wants to hear that? Even Maya sits and stares blankly at his saccharine words. Naomi manages to not vomit, though, which is something.

Violet is standing in the corner alone stress eating when Pete finds her. She bleats that this is her wedding: her dress, her food, her location, her music. This is her wedding. Then she starts crying mutely and eating her hair. Pete jabs a syringe full of Xanax into her arm and hides her underneath the buffet table.

Addison tells Sam that his speech was really beautiful (lies make baby Jesus cry, Addison), but Sam isn't really interested in her platitudes. He glares at her and coldly states that when she slept with Mark Sloane he didn't say anything (hmm, I wouldn't be so sure you didn't say anything), but she can't sleep with Pete. He's his friend. He won't stand for it. But he doesn't want to talk about it now. Not at his daughter's wedding. Then why did you bring it up, chucklehead? Sam goes to dance with Maya leaving Addison looking all hurt and stunned and pained and wearing a scarlet letter. Then everyone dances... The end.

Watch the shotgun wedding and baby killing episode in its entirety.

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Private Practice

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