Private Practice

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DeAnn Welker: D- | Grade It Now!
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Bill Buchanan comes into the office that he apparently owns, as Naomi's getting breakfast. He thinks this means she's thinking about working for him, but it actually just means she was hungry. But they are still on for dinner, so she probably is still thinking about it. Charlotte sees it all happen, smiles awkwardly as Sheldon and Bill go into an office together, and then turns around to tell Cooper, who's in her office, that Bill's meeting with everyone except her. Cooper's phone beeps as he tells her that she has a contract, so he can't push her out. Charlotte wants to talk to him and thinks it's Violet on the phone. Again. Cooper yells "Grasshopper!" as he leaves. Weird.

He enters an office at Oceanside and asks if Violet "Grasshoppered" him. She nods, and we find out it's because the baby (or "bug") is coming. Dell's there. Addison comes in right after Cooper, and says she knows this is Dell's case, but she's here for support. Pete comes in, and Violet and Pete are all, "We're going to do this." Dell's all, "Not today," because she isn't dilated and is not in labor. She tries to pretend she knows labor because she's a doctor, and Dell says she knows psychosis, but not labor. I would like to point out she's not great at the psychosis stuff, either. Addison agrees and leaves. Violet wants the baby out. Pete tells her to be patient. Sheldon comes running in frantically at the last minute, with a stuffed pig. He holds Violet's hand, and Pete's on the other side of her. It's awkward. But when is it not on this show?

Naomi greets Calamity Jane and Jackie, who apparently showed up at the exact same time for separate ultrasound appointments. Jane gets to go first, and Jackie tells them to take their time, since she's waiting on her husband. There are so many things about that situation that would never happen in real life. It would make me mad except that it's this show, so why bother? Pete's making the crazy lady who wanted to keep her dead baby inside her (keeping with the TV stars of the past theme, though, she's also Marshall's wife, Carrie, on Alias) feel good. She's laying in his office saying "Do it more," and the like. But it appears to be a massage. You know, because he's a real doctor. He asks if she's feeling better, and she has no idea what he's talking about. She pretends she doesn't know what "loss" he's referring to. She says there's no grief. She just changed her way of thinking. This is a celebration, because she made life, even though the baby was lost. And labor's hard, anyway. Did you know that? He reminds her to take her medications, since she has a history of delusions.

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Private Practice

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