MONDO EXTRAS

Now it's time to meet the girls! We see Megan outside what appears to be the girls' bedroom door. She knocks tentatively and then peaks her head in. We see two large beds side by side. One is occupied by a girl sound asleep wearing a sleeping mask. The other bed appears to be empty. Megan bids the room's occupants good morning and at once someone stirs from the seemingly empty bed. It's another be-masked girl, who without taking the mask off to see who's interrupted her slumber, takes aim with a taser and shoots Megan, who immediately falls to the ground in convulsions. If I had a nickel for every time I could've used one of those handy taser guns ... The girl in the other bed takes off her mask to see what's happened and cries, "Sage get up I think you just tasered our tutor!" Ok, so you must be Rose then. And with that we go to commercial.

Now we're in the mansion's kitchen as an immaculately turned out chef flips through a tabloid magazine and bemoans Rumer Willis's unfortunate face. Megan, we see, has her head down on the table and is apparently recovering from her taser attack. The chef dude introduces himself as Marco Giordani and offers her coffee, which she at first declines, saying that coffee will not be nearly enough to resurrect her from her recent injury. Then she smells it and thinks otherwise. Marco goes on flipping through the magazine, commenting on a suit that he wants his tailor to recreate for the upcoming first social event of the season. Because we all know it's the norm for rich-ass philanthropists to invite the help to their social events.

The girls, who are dressed like Cher and Dionne circa Clueless in bright mini-skirt suits, sweep into the kitchen and Rose apologizes for the unfortunate tasering incident, explaining that most people know not to enter their bedchamber before noon. Sage, the older and apparently bitchier one, comments that " I puke cuter outfits than the one you're wearing," by way of introduction. Then she explains that their photographer really advises them to get a solid eleven hours of sleep, and we find that they're to appear in a fashion spread for some local magazine that celebrates young hot heiresses, apparently. Undeterred, Megan explains that she knows school starts in five days so she's devised a study plan for them that entails reading three chapters of The Great Gatsby per day, having discussions in the afternoon and formulating a final thesis. She says they can meet her in the library in a few minutes and they can get started. They look at each other like yeaaaaah.