Project Runway
Making A Splash

Episode Report Card
Jeff Long: A | Grade It Now!
Making A Splash

Julia is next. I can see now why Jay picks her so often. This is one of his edgiest designs, and I feel like she is working it perfectly. It is essentially a black satin bikini with black straps asymmetrically wrapping around the body. Or, as Jay describes it, "Two little black band-aids with dental floss wrapped around it." It's really cool. I don't know that a person with any body fat whatsoever could pull this off, but Julia's doing it and it's hot.

The scores have been tabulated. The designers come onstage, and Heidi asks Kara Saun to step forward. She is exempt from last week, so she leaves. The best and worst are left onstage. Their models come out.

Richard asks Robert to repeat his sports-car mantra. Constance is NOT buying. You can tell Robert probably wouldn't have pulled out his old sports-car/woman simile in this company. Thanks for the cock block, Richard. Robert reminds Constance that, oftentimes, people name their cars after women. Her reply? "Just because it happens doesn't mean it's right."

Jay describes his design as "techno-bohemian." Richard calls Jay a "flamboyant character" (read: "way too gay for me"), and he wonders if Jay could fit into a business setting. Fuck off, Richard Johnson! You work for a shitty daily rag as a GOSSIP COLUMNIST. Where you get off giving people lessons in decorum or why they shouldn't be so fucking faggy is beyond me. Not trying to be soapboxy, but you can see Jay reading him this way, too. When he says, "Jay, you're a very flamboyant character," Jay gets really still and goes, "Mmm. Sometimes." And, then, he starts shifting a lot. It sounds like I'm reading a lot into it, but I swear it's there.

Constance asks Alexandra what she thinks of her design. Alexandra says she was inspired by Missoni and Michael Kors. Constance replies that she could have been a little more creative.

Constance asks Austin about his design. He says "swathed" again. Constance spots the Esther Williams inspiration.

Heidi asks Kevin if his design is "swimmable" and he says it is. Then, he repeats "It stretches" three times, like he's trying to convince himself. Heidi hears none of them and tells him that his suit doesn't look like a swimsuit. Richard Johnson asks him if he thought he'd made a good impression at the party the previous night, and Kevin replies, "I think I was good...maybe...I was good. I was good...I think." That was painful.

Anne asks about Wendy's suit. Wendy says that it was designed to hide a girl's upper thighs. Wow, you know that's exactly what a dress or a nightgown or other garments that cover the body but aren't swimsuits do. Much as Wendy's design wasn't a swimsuit. Anne concurs with me, saying that it looks more like a dress than a swimsuit. As well, she wonders if the fabric of the suit would be flattering to the thighs-for-hiding once wet. Heidi asks what is beneath the suit, and Wendy is forced to explain that she made a sub-par thong and that Martinique has provided her own thong for this runway experience.

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Project Runway




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