Project Runway
Postal Uniform Challenge

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 2 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Not Without My Daughter (And A Sharpie)

Tim then takes Wendy out in the hallway for a talking-to about the way the judges perceive her work. He is holding an ugly black shoe with Velcro closures, explaining that Michael Kors thinks the stuff she does is "dowdy." He tells her to keep that in mind as she works on her design. Tim interviews that the judges are "high-end," and that the look Wendy was working on just now was not going to make it. "Furthermore," Tim adds, "it was being presented with this inconceivable shoe that was bringing the look down to the most dowdy place it could possibly be." Wendy now tells us -- a little wounded, a little sarcastic -- that "for some reason," Tim decided to tell her that the judges think her stuff is dowdy. Well, he's telling you that to help you, dummy! Not that all of us think he should be helping you, but helping you he is. So you could...you know, shut up and listen. Also: I love the idea of an "inconceivable shoe." It is a shoe of which you cannot conceive, you know? You cannot smell what this shoe is cooking. Furthermore, Wendy claims that Tim said this to her "in front of the whole workroom," while in fact, he says it to her in the hall. It's not impossible that he said it to her in the workroom and then again in the hall, but it's also not impossible that Wendy is once again living in Wendyworld, where things look very different than they do to the rest of us. And all the fashionable ladies have multiple hair colors.

"From a functional standpoint," Wendy says, "I feel like that was a good shoe." But Tim holds up the shoe neatly and tells her that it's "an obstacle." He goes on: "If you can make this work, by all means, do it." And then, in his interview, Tim snippily vents his frustration about what he was trying to do for Wendy: "I am trying to help you here," he says to imaginary Wendy-In-The-Camera. "Please...don't defend the shoe to me." Hee. Oh, Tim. I'm totally going to say that as often as possible, perhaps for the rest of my life. I'm going to start now: Don't defend the shoe to me!

Where was I? Oh, right. Anyway, what's insane is that Tim winds up indirectly complimenting the ugly, totally irrelevant, rather inconceivable-their-own-damn-selves red-and-white shoes that Wendy is wearing, just because while they are stupid and obnoxious, they aren't "dowdy." Indicative of psychiatric instability of the highest order, yes. Dowdy, no. Tim explains in an interview that Wendy is...well, Tim is saying that Wendy could design for Wal-Mart, is my opinion, even though he uses the words "broader market" and "great respect" instead of "just like Kathie Lee, but without the slave labor." ["Or...maybe with the slave labor, after all." -- Wing Chun] Wendy snots in an interview of her own that she made a postal uniform that looked like a postal uniform, not "the cover of Vogue magazine." Because, of course, there is no in between. I hate it when I get up to dress for work, and I'm like, "Well, will I wear a postal uniform, or will I dress like I'm on the cover of Vogue?" It's very complicated. I either spend the day falling off my stilettos, or else people keep asking me how much postcards cost. "Sue me," Wendy eye-rolls.

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