Project Runway

Episode Report Card
LuluBates: B+ | Grade It Now!
Frock You!

The next morning the designers are back at work, sewing, stitching, and bitching. I know it's a two-day challenge and everything, but oh my GOD can we please have something on the screen other than people with a mouthful of pins staring at fabric? We haven't even had that many commercials, although I may be the only person to have a complaint about that. It's just all sewing all the time. Like if I wanted this much stitchery I'd go be an overlord at a sweatshop or join one of those sewing circles/terrorist societies that are so popular around women's colleges. While Shirin is nine kinds of nervous, Althea had fun with the challenge because she could really let loose on this one and get in touch with her inner drag queen. Her silvery sheath is glamorous though. Thank the good lord Tim is sending the models in. They have two hours to get them to hair and make up. Hopefully some of that time will be on camera. Nicolas thinks his outfit looks amazing, but he's nervous because all the other designers have full length gowns or big reveals and his looks like a sequined swan, but not in the cool Bjork kind of way, but more in the Swan Lake on Ice sort of way. Carol Hannah has added about two geese worth of feathers to her dress and it looks pretty amazing. Irina tells her model Celine that Carol Hannah is a mediocre designer with a bad personality to boot. Um, Irina? I hate to be the one to point this out to you, because you are a little scary, but some people would think "total bitch" is a bad personality to have, too. In one of the most hilarious interviews, Nicolas comes on and says, "Irina is a really good designer; her only problem is that she's a bitch." Yes, that pretty much sums it up. Christopher thinks you couldn't ask for more than a bustier and sparkle panties. I'm not even sure what to say about that. Tim announces that it is ten minutes until runway time. Carol Hannah is hot gluing feathers on to her frock, while Gordana is complaining that everything has gone wrong today. Tim calls time and everyone files to the runway, some looking grimmer than others.

Heidi steps onto the runway in a simple black dress which is the antithesis of Mackie-style and it is a welcome relief. Like, seriously, my eyes! Heidi introduces today's judges: Bob Mackey and, thank god!, Nina Garcia is back. She should slap some sense into those sequins. Heidi then pretends like there is a super secret surprise guest like Michael Kors is going to pop out of the back and we can actually have both judges in the same place at the same time. But no, it's just Christina Aguilera. This season has really suffered from the lack of consistent judging. How are the judges supposed to know how the designers are evolving if they only show up to collect their paychecks? Any way, Miss Marmalade has extremely straight white blonde hair and very, very severe bangs. She's wearing an adorable blue strapless dress with a black waistband. And she only comes up to Heidi's shoulder! Aw she's a little gnome! Precious! I bet she hangs out with that hot Travelocity guy -- all the celebrities know each other. Heidi boosts Christina into her seat and the runway show starts.

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Project Runway




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