Project Runway
Sew Me What You Got

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Jeff Long: B | Grade It Now!
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Sew Me What You Got

Here come the models! As we see them finding their assigned designers, Chris interviews that he was very happy with his model. "This girl is gorgeous!" Victorya is very happy with her model too.

Now, the moment this season will have to live up to from now on. Elisa tells her model that she needs to hand-measure her. Then she…measures the girl's height using her hands. Like, when she's done she'll be like, "Mandy is seven and a half hands tall." And when she's measuring the model, it looks like a mix of dance, witch-doctoring, and molestation. It's one of the most amazing three seconds of television we are likely to witness this year. I love Elisa. Unless she's a brilliant actress, she is totally authentic with this crap.

Steven's model is having a hard time fitting into his design. Jillian's model tells her that she loves the color of the design. Christian's model tells him that his design is "very London." He responds, "I know," as if he's being criticized, but the girl is like, "I love it." He interviews that his model loves his outfit and so does he.

At 15 minutes until the show, everyone is scurrying like mad. Some are working until the very last minute. Elisa has her model do a test walk and the girl gets tangled up in the crap at the bottom. Elisa says that her intuition is telling her to cut off the bottom of the dress, but she doesn't do it. Bad judgment on this girl.

Simone has to sew her model into her dress. Oh, Simone. Christian's model tells him that she thinks everyone's design "is the best." Christian disagrees and says that "I think there's some hand-sewed crap up in here." This guy feels like a rerun. That rote bitchiness disguised as "keeping it real." Yawn.

Tim enters the workroom to bring everyone to the runway. The Bravo question of the night is, "What do you love about Project Runway?" The choices are Diva Designers, Runway Walk-Offs, Catty Judges, or Tim!

At the runway, Heidi enters in a lovely shimmering gold dress. Heidi gives her "you're in or you're out" speech in all its requisite solemnity. Three of them will be going to Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week (I still miss saying "Olympus Fashion Week"…I don't know, it was just better). The winner will have "the opportunity" to sell their line on bluefly.com, and will get a spread in Elle, a 2008 Saturn Astra, and $100,000 to start their own fashion line.

Heidi introduces the judges. Michael Kors…maybe it's my imagination, but I could swear he's at least two shades of orange lighter than in previous seasons. Nina Garcia, lit in such a way as to emphasize the dazzling array of fly-aways she is afflicted with, smiles and greets the designers. The special guest judge is "acclaimed designer" Monique Lhuillier, who designed Britney Spears's wedding dress.

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Project Runway

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