Project Runway

Episode Report Card
Jeff Long: A | Grade It Now!
Melting Pot Meltdown

Jay and Mila's stuff is next. Jay's daytime look includes pants of a tan fabric. The shape is puffed at the mid-thigh and tight on the calf. They're pretty cool. But the top. It's a tank of black and red stripe. It would be alright if it were fitted, AT ALL. It's like the model was naked and I painted the top on my TV screen. Jay is really proud of himself. For the pants. Mila's nighttime look is, wait for this, black and white color-blocking. BORING. I can't even describe it. Sorry. It's too fucking boring for words. Do something else, Mila, before I... I don't know. Anyway, black, white and red tights. Blah.

Next we have Amy and Jonathan. Wait, that's not a shirt dress. Oh no, Amy. That's a shirt. With a belt. And black tights. The shirt is peach. Cerri may look alright in peach, but it's still not a contemporary color. That said, there's really interesting vertical pleating in the shirt and... if were only LONGER. Amy thinks that the details speak to her style. Jonathan's dress is next. Yikes! It's a brown and darker brown(?) thing that has all of these crazy cut-outs on it. I totally see the wrought-iron influence, but it's just too much. It's fitted, and perfectly fitted, but no. Jonathan feels that they took a unique view of the Upper East Side which is completely and totally and absolutely true, though not correct.

Jesus, all of this shit is ugly. Here's Seth Aaron and Emilio. Seth Aaron's daytime look comes out first. It's a denim two-piece thing. The top is his usual puffed shit with stuff everywhere. She's wearing the craziest like plaid toque. I don't know what to say. The pants are high-waisted and there's some sort of crazy floral print poking out from beneath the jacket. I seriously have been to Harlem. I don't know. And Emilio's look is a black evening gown of black. There's a slit in the front that ends mid-thigh. The lining is chartreuse. Um, tacky. Seriously, Billie would be asking you to ring up Dior and bypass this shiz. Oh God, this is so ugly. The neckline has very clear references to the Billie era, but the fabric is sooo cheap-looking. Emilio thinks that he hit a home run, for all that he knows about sports.

Heidi calls Jay/Mila and Jonathan/Amy. They have the lowest scores. Seth Aaron and Emilio congratulate each other. The losers leave the stage while the others' models come back. Heidi is in love with both of the Emilio/Seth Aaron pieces. Weird. Am I losing it? I think this stuff is riDONK. Francisco says that he initially thought that the gown should have been shorter, but everything else sucked and he had to like something. He didn't say that last part. Emilio says that he brought color to Seth Aaron's design. Bravo, Emilio, you made that stupid denim thing look even crazier. I never hate anything as much as I'm hating this right now. I just think it looks so BAD! I'm even thinking that Collier Strong was wrong. The makeup is atrocious on the day look. She looks like a chemo patient. Nina likes the color, but thinks that Seth Aaron needs to lay off all of the details. Molly loves it, but I don't care about her. She thinks all of the metal and shit on Seth Aaron's look is great. Fuck off, Molly. Heidi asks them how they worked together and they say it was great. They "meshed."

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Project Runway




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