Project Runway

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What the Frock?

The designers are lined up with their backs facing the runway. This situation has come about because after last week's disappointments the judges can't stand the sight of them anymore. Christopher hears rustling noises, squeaks, and hides under his chair because he knows (KNOWS) that the judges are coming to flatten him or at least, flatten his faux-hawk. Heidi surveys the backs of the designers contemplating who to take out first. She glances around, realizes the cameras are rolling, sighs and tells them to turn around. The designers all gasp when faced with the ghosts of designs past that have filled the runway. Each of the designer's winning looks is displayed on a dress form. Well, except for Logan's. He never had a dress that won, so they've given him a dress that didn't win and thus it doesn't get to be on a dress form, but instead is sloppily tacked to the front of one, like the producers didn't want to expend the effort of actually putting it on the mannequin. Logan sighs in despair because he can see that smoke in the distance and knows that the train of termination is coming for him. Heidi explains that the challenge is that they must create a companion look for their outfit. Logan is excited to be working with his floor-length grey dress with the zipper accent. Irina obviously takes a moment to be bitch. She thinks this challenge will really show the difference between the good designers and the lucky wins. Of course in Irina's overblown head, every design was a lucky win except for hers. She thinks a few people should have gone home already. In fact, they should probably just give her the $100,000 check and the Buick right now and send everyone else home.

Tim meets the designers in the work room to explain the rules. They will have $100 for materials and can work only until midnight to complete their looks. Everyone gasps in horror. Althea explains that her winning look was a mini-skirt with a "paper bag" waist as in the top is cinched together with a belt like a paper bag. This is by no means the same thing as a cinched up Hefty bag. This is paper, not plastic. She wants to use the paper bag waist on a pair of pants and then make an oversized sweater to complete the look. As a designer, she likes to play with volume. Yes, your hair speaks volumes to that point. It's like her hair has a secret life. I mean, was it that... large at the beginning of the competition? Has her hair been going out at night and living the high (very high) life in the big (very big) city? Irina is excited to be working with her Aspen look, while Gordana was assigned her edgy grey dress from the divorcee challenge and wants to replicate that edgy sophistication. Speaking of sophistication... oh wait, no, we're talking about Christopher. He thinks this challenge is so fantastic on this like metaphysical level where you have to be inspired by your own inspiration. It's like Richard Simmons, but with frocks. His winning design was a short dress, but he does not learn anything from this rather obvious statement and instead decides that he is going to make a long dress. Only he calls it a gown to make it sound less like a bad idea. Also, I have always hated the dress that won. It's the one that sort of looks like a plastic poodle on the top and a bedskirt on the bottom. But the judges loved it, so it must be AMAZING and I am a blind moronic monkey with no fashion sense at all. Oh well.

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Project Runway




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