Project Runway

Episode Report Card
Al Lowe: A | Grade It Now!
Oh, Baby, Baby, How Was He Supposed to Know?
a beautiful dress, and the coat is presh. But, heeeee, I'm sorry. The BELLY looks INSANE. I have known oh, two dozen pregnant women in my life. Women of all different pregnancy shapes and sizes. Never has a woman hit the streets with such a basketball belly. It is slaying me to see model after model sex-walk down the runway with this thing bouncing in front of them. They couldn't have thrown in some maternity models for this challenge? Such women do exist!

Nicolas is pleased with his black on black ensemble which I do agree is quite chic, but he panics when he notices the back of the girl's skirt riding up as she returns up the runway, especially when he notices Heidi writing something frantically as his model walks by.

Christopher's off-the-shoulder royal purple bubble dress is actually quite cute. He's paired it with leggings, which I think is realistic, and though it is overly satiny, it looks very nice and well-made.

Mitchell tries to rally himself saying he feels like his model looks like a very hip pregnant girl about to go out on a night on the town with her girlfriends in his shorts of doom. Seriously, they look terrible, and only the most ridiculous tabloid-fame-seeking Hollywood teenage mothers would wear them, and even then they would have sewed them themselves.

Qristyl's dress is not bad, honestly. The colors -- a weird terra cotta shade paired with a black band at the bottom -- are all wrong, but the shape is flattering. There's a rope halter neckline and it looks good on the runway.

Next up, Epperson's... jumpsuit. Now, work with me here, I think that on an actual pregnant model this would look good. On a pregnant regular person, maybe not. And on an un-pregnant model with a melon under her shirt, it looks crazy. Plus, it's white satin... it's hard to say how this would really look in a real situation. It has a jacket with a belt and, as Epperson says, he was going for elegant. I think he might have achieved it, actually, but the thing looks weird to me on this model.

Once again, Louise is happy with her dress. Like last week, she went with a shoulder corsage effect on one shoulder, which maybe is what she will now become known for... The dress does look like lingerie, but it's pretty. She is thrilled with it.

Also happy is Gordana. Her black short top (dress?) over leggings is tasteful, but is perhaps overly youthful? The black makes it seem sophisticated, but then she threw a cardigan over it, which I don't like.

Next up, Johnny's dress which I love and which we see two seconds of. It's black, appears to be made of some comfortable, natural looking fabric, and has white piping on the sides. It swings and flows and is nice and long, with black and white detailing on one shoulder.

But they can't take time showing you something good, because Malvin's creation is up next, and we must all watch as this wreck is paraded before us. He, naturally, loves it, especially because it looks like an egg! "I feel that the pieces are flattering towards a woman's body," he insists, and though he is wrong and got this challenge all messed up in his mind, I cringe as I think of his fate.

Ra'Mon's pretty bowling dress is next. I mean, he tried. It's well-made, certainly, and the graphic element would be exciting perhaps if the dress was not maternity. Imagine this in purple and gray. That's the dress. Watching it go by, he risks a glance at the judges' expressions. "They are like, stone-cold," he says, and now he's worried.

Carol Hannah's green dress is nice enough, and she has a little short ruffled silver jacket on top. Both cute, looks bad together. This model, who allegedly was once pregnant herself, is the worst looking fake-pregnant model, ever. Her belly is resting on her knees.

Althea's beautiful long navy dress is next, and though the cups of the bodice are a little small for the model, she is pleased with how it turned out. The ribbon element on the top and back looks so nice and tailored, almost sailor-style, but classy.

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Project Runway




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