Pushing Daisies

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Al Lowe: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Bitterly Bad Idea

Later, at the morgue, Emerson and Chuck stare at Billy's body, fighting over their next steps. "I'm just sayin'," Chuck points out, "it's been a while since you solved a crime for real, you know, the old-fashioned way." As Emerson snarks about her annoying "blabberjabbering," we hear a familiar "hmmm" from the doorway, and the esteemed coroner makes a long-awaited appearance. "This what you do when you're in here muttering with the bodies?" he asks. "Bicker and moan?" Emerson hedges that they were just, um, observing for, er, any visible signs. "I like my way better," the coroner says. Emerson: "Which is?" Awesome Coroner: "Cut the suckah open." Chuck is understandably turned on by this, and it is determined that she will hang out for the autopsy while Emerson goes to do some background checking on the deceased.

Meanwhile, Olive, with Digby, has arrived at the jail, sobbing uncontrollably through the partition. "I brought you a pie," she wails. "It has a special filling." I'll say -- through the honey-baked crust, we see a revolver and eight garnishing bullets. Beautiful. And Kristin Chenoweth's face...She is brilliant, and if she doesn't win an Emmy, someone should get smacked.

Emerson's background checking has revealed little to nothing, and he is still on the phone at the Pie Hole when Chuck comes in. He raises a finger to silence her when she tries to interrupt. "How did you know about the finger?" she asks, amazed. Emerson says he learned early on about the finger, since it's well-known to be the universal symbol for "hush up, I'm on the damn phone." Chuck, for once, can be rightfully smug: oh, she says, it must also be the universal symbol for Billy Balsam biting off his killer's finger and the coroner finding it in his stomach at the autopsy. Again, I say, ewww. Unfortunately, the fingerprint on the offending digit was too degraded by stomach acid, and they can't get a match that way. Well, Emerson points out, whoever did it is out there walking around with nine fingers. "Mm hmm," Chuck gladly agrees, "foot-loose and finger-free." Oh, come on.

MEANWHILE, back in his cell, Ned is worrying about the damn Dead Dad thing about which I cannot be bothered. Jim Dale would back me up, I'm sure, if he wasn't distracted just now by Ned's newly arrived cellmate, Burly Bruce. Seconds from his own violent death at the hands of the angry BB, Ned can think only of Chuck, thus giving him the genius idea of asking Burly Bruce about his own untouchable girlfriend, Sheila, melting the crazy dude's heart. What follows is a filler-story about how Burly Bruce ordered his doll ("girlfriend") through a catalogue ("personal ad") in order to have someone to ride with him in the carpool lane.

Back at the Pie Hole, Emerson and Chuck are talking over the whole fingerless killer. Emerson complains that no missing-digit tragedies have been reported at any nearby hospitals. Maybe, Chuck posits, due to phantom-limb syndrome, the killer hasn't even noticed his missing finger. "Hey, yeah," Emerson snarks, "that would narrow our list of suspects down to only insanely stupid people." Emerson says their only choice is to go back to Bittersweets and investigate the scene of the crime. Chuck cringes. How will they get past Dilly?

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Pushing Daisies

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