The trap set, the team goes to the aunts to wait. Of course, breaking it to Lily that they are using her home as a target for theft and violence is... delicate. While Chuck remains upstairs where she has snuck into her bedroom-cum-cheese locker, she listens to the drama unfold on her old string-telephone contraption she set up in childhood to spy on the aunts. Alone, she also goes through the mementos in her cigar box. Downstairs, though, things aren't going so well. Swoosie Kurtz might be giving the Chenoweth a run for the money, here. "You must be outta your damn MINDS!" Lily yells. "There is no way in Tinkerbell's tiny buttcheeks that you are gonna roll out the welcome mat on my front porch for a buncha thieves!" Ned cringes that he knows it's an imposition. "An IMpoSITion is ordering clams at a Kosher deli!" Lily screams. "Robbers nowadays are multi-hyphenate hoodlums! They don't just rob! No, they strip you naked, lather you in lard, slide you into the walls and leave you! THEN they rob you!" So great. In the background, Ned and Emerson set up the room, turning off various lights, while Lily and Vivian argue back and forth on the couch, with Olive between them. Vivian thinks Lily is jealous of the attention Dwight is paying her. "Vivian," Lily says with extreme chagrin, "I love you. I don't want to see this fetish you have for raffish men hurt you like it has in the past." Ned tries to interject: "On the topic of Dwight..." Lily: "KEEP OUTTA THIS!" Olive here takes a shot at breaking the tension, but is once again silenced by Lily. "Do I have my patch on the wrong eye," she snarks, "or did it suddenly get very dark in here?" Ah, it all abruptly becomes clear. She realizes that Olive, Ned and Emerson are trying to set the house up to look vacant. "Wait a MINUTE!" she shouts anew. "We're being robbed TONIGHT!" Vivian, alternately, is titillated.
Upstairs, Chuck is finding no information about Dwight in her father's letters. The secrets, she realizes, must remain with her father in his grave. A grave, JD reminds us, right next to her own grave. A grave, we realize as we see an ominous shadow in the bedroom window, to which she may soon return. The door bursts open. "Fear not, madameOOAAWW!" Rob Wright starts, but is soon thwarted when Chuck flings a well-aimed cigar box into his midsection. She warns him, to be fair, that she has a gun, though he must also be fair and say he doesn't believe her. She threatens to call for help, but he notices she hasn't yet, perhaps because she feels, as he does, that society has a responsibility to protect its lowest ranks. "I am no killer," he says, "merely a soldier of fortune. Other people's fortunes." Hee. Chuck suggests that Gustav would have felt otherwise, since Rob Wright and Tam Phong so obviously robbed him and killed him. Ah, but no -- Rob says that first of all, Tam is but another unwitting victim of his schemes. And secondly, yeah, he robbed Gustav, but only because Gustav asked him to. "I know how this must sound," he says, "but the facts are these." Chuck: "Huh?" Rob: "These, are the facts." Awesome.