They are pondering all this when Buddy walks in, alarmed to see Barb laid out on his sofa. "Oh, she's dead," Emerson says casually. "Thanks to your happy hug machine." They ask him if he knows a Randy Mann (hee) and say they think he may be the old Spartan mascot Buddy messed with in high school, come back for revenge. Handing off his yearbook, Buddy quickly exits, saying he has to evacuate the building. The gang is just discovering that there's no Randy Mann listed in the yearbook when the lights go out and they hear Buddy cry for help. Flailing to go help him, Chuck knocks Ned into the glass case containing the dressed-up football dummy, shattering glass everywhere. "That was close!" Ned says. Emerson: "yeah, the last thing we need is another dead body on our hands." Except, see, uh... the dummy? Is a dead body. Which they find out when Ned touches him and his skeletal remains come back to life. AIIIEE!
Thing is, the mummified footballer can't really talk all that much, because he's a mummy. "Sorry about that," Chuck says, apologizing for their shrieks after the guy takes his mannequin-faced helmet off and they see his true visage. "We weren't expecting such a leathery, mummy-like..." Through signs and gestures and points to the yearbook, they discern the facts, and the facts were these: this guy, Aries Kostopoulos, was the high school quarterback. BUDDY was the mascot! AND Buddy killed this dude, too. Duh dun duuuh! "What kind of person holds on to a dead body?" Chuck asks, shuddering, but before anyone can stop him, Buddy arrives fully suited up in his mascot uniform to provide the answer: "the kind that wants to preserve a friendship." Whoa! Here's the other facts: Aries K., back in the day, was the BMOC f'reals. Beloved by all, and so smooth he could toss a message-bearing football into the stands to just the right fan. "Your bazooms," it read. "Under the bleachers. 9 p.m." Oh, how my husband did laugh at that.