By this time, Stuart, having procured the telephone number of the man from the phone booth, is walking to catch up with Vince, who's waiting patiently for him at the Jeep. As he does so, he passes Nathan, throwing him a lingering glance. We see this in slow motion, the only audio being the muted tones of some dance track emanating from a nearby club. Stuart looks away from Nathan's cigarette-smoking figure for a couple of seconds, and then stops and turns to face him. I thought he was going to tell him to have his GP check out that (possibly malignant, definitely fugly) growth on his face, but no.
Cut to Stuart against a red backdrop, facing the camera and talking about the first time he ever messed around with a guy. He was twelve years old, it was his PE teacher, he (Stuart) babbled a lot and ended up joining his teacher in the shower, fully clothed. Thanks for sharing, Stu, but you were just about to ask the little blond boy to go home with you.
After Stuart asks Nathan to come back to his place, we cut to another character-facing-camera shot -- this time it's Nathan, talking about how proud he is of himself that, the first time he ever went to Canal Street to pick up a guy, he scored -- especially since he's only fifteen and all. After his little "Go, me! Go, me! It's muh birthday!" celebration, he looks at the camera and recites Stuart's full name -- Stuart Alan Jones -- in the sickly-sweet way I'd previously thought annoying teenaged girls had patented as their own.
Needless to say, Nathan agrees to go home with Stuart, and Vince -- still anxiously waiting at the Jeep -- is visibly annoyed at the young pup's appearance on the scene. But our adorable, put-upon Vincent soon has his attention diverted to his beefy stalker-man, who is obviously following the Jeep out of the parking lot in his own sports car. "Go a-way," Vince moans.
Back at Stuart's vast, meticulously decorated flat -- the kind of place The Real World's producers try to pass off as just your average roach motel, but is actually only used as a set for shows like Queer as Folk and...The Real World -- Nathan witters on about how he doesn't cook, eats loads of take-out, loves Chinese food, blah blah scaredvirgincakes. So, no, he's not handling the nervousness thing very well at all. Stuart, who's made his way toward the bedroom, takes his shirt off and moseys over to Nervous Nellie. "You stayin' out here, or what?" he asks, in a voice that's not deliberately provocative, but does the job all the same. They engage in what I recorded in my notes as a "hot, long snog," with the camera circling them for a good ten seconds. It's camerawork Spike Lee would be proud of.