Queer as Folk U.S.
All Better Now

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Well, It Was Better Than Last Week's

Justin stands across the street from Brian's apartment, just like in his dream. He crosses the street and runs up the stairs. He knocks on the door, calling Brian's name a couple of times. Brian opens the door, looking blasé and determined at the same time. Justin's relieved that it was Brian who answered the door. Brian asks who else it would be, but Justin shakes it off and tries to walk past Brian into the loft. Brian asks him where he's going. Justin's all, I'm going inside the loft! Brian replies, "Did I say you could?" Justin laughs, "Don't give me any shit, all right? I nearly freaked out five times getting here." Brian orders Justin to go home. Justin's confused. Brian's all, yeah, sorry, we can't hang. Justin's still confused, and asks if Brian has someone over. Brian snaps that it's none of Justin's business, so beat it, kid. Brian heart's not in it, but he closes the door in Justin's face, anyway.

Wertshafter and Co. The camera pans past men in cubicles, each looking at straight porn on their computer. The camera stops on Ted. Ted's looking at gay porn, featuring a guy nicknamed "The Chunnel," who's sticking a huge black dildo where the sun don't shine. Ted's also on the phone with Emmett, busy dressing a mannequin at Torso. Emmett's like, you're on misterfister.net again ["Oh dear; there is a site with a URL very close to that one, and it sure isn't a porn site. This is why writers should do a little research to make sure their jokes don't backfire on some poor dude with a personal website." -- Wing Chun]; Ted says he's on his coffee break. Emmett tells Ted he's always on a coffee break. Emmett looks at his own butt from time to time in the mirror, because he's still thinking about a butt-lift. Yay. Emmett asks when Ted gets the time to work. Ted says that he's actually supposed to be working on something else right now. Then Ted spills coffee all over his lap. Ted swears and stammers that he "has to get off." Emmett rolls his eyes, "Are you sure you didn't already?" Guess what happens next? Mr. Wertshafter himself peeks over the cubicle! And Ted has a wet lap! And porn on the computer! Porn with the sound turned up, because Ted isn't just pathetic, but an idiot as well! What are the odds?

Justin's room. Justin's throwing a big ole temper tantrum, along with everything else he can get his hands on. He's ripping his pictures off the wall, the sheets off the bed, books off the table. Jennifer and Molly come running in. Molly whines, "Why is Justin freaking out?" like this is fucking up her entire day. Jennifer orders Molly to go to her room, and tries to get Justin to calm down by grabbing his arm. Justin elbows her in the chest, and starts with the screaming. You told him not to see me anymore, blah, you had no right exclamation point yada how dare you, aneurysm, fury, etc. Jennifer tries to tell him that she did it for his own good. That never goes over well. Jennifer tries to touch him again, and Justin pushes her across the room and into a wall. Justin screams, "It's too late! My life is fucked. Chris Hobbes saw to that! He should have killed me!" Jennifer is horrified, which means it's time once again to indulge the overdramatic teenager, methinks.

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Queer as Folk U.S.

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