Zee gym. Mike and Emmett work out as Ted rants about getting fired. He's the hardest worker there! Everyone else was watching porn (I guess he can see through cubicle walls), but he got fired because he was looking at gay porn! Not because he was looking at porn on company time, with company resources, and appeared to be jacking off as well. No, it's a vast heterosexual conspiracy against Ted. Ted threatens to file a discrimination suit against The Shaft. Then he worries over whether he'll be able to find another job. And Ted just goes on and on and on. Emmett, in order to move the plot along, pulls out the local gay newspaper. Maybe Ted can find something in the classifieds section. Ted is skeptical, to say the least. Emmett says that he was looking for something, too, you know. So that he can pay for his butt-lift. He finds an ad for a job that pays a hundred dollars an hour. Doesn't say what for, so Emmett pulls out his cell phone and calls. Mike muses over what type of job it could be: "Volunteer for hideous medical experiments?" Doesn't pay nearly as much. "Serve as a live target for the military?" Nah, they got people in Afghanistan now who are doing that for free. Hey. I'm just saying. There's a surplus. Emmett discovers, "It's one of the those domestic services -- you know, waiters, private parties, maids." Ted's pretty sure there has to be more to it than that. Mike says it's better money than he could make in a week at the Big Q. Mike asks if Ted's down for it. Ted reminds him he has an MBA from Wharton, for God's sakes: "I don't do windows." Mike didn't even finish community college, so he'll do anything. Emmett gleefully announces that the company has openings, then grabs his ass and gloats, "Well, boys. Things are looking up."
Brian's. The Trick du Nuit puts on his pants. Brian mopes on the bed, still naked. TDN looks at La Kinney for a second, then sits down next to him and says: "Did you ever see Citizen Kane?" Brian mopes that he has. TDN continues, "All my life, all I've heard is how it's the greatest fucking movie ever made. So I finally rent it. The guy who plays the lead is fat. The story about some sled sucks. And it's in black and white." Moron. Brian drawls, "Maybe you were expecting too much." TDN snaps, "Like with you." I fell. Off the couch. LAUGHING. TDN continues, "All I ever heard is how Brian Kinney is the greatest fuck ever. If you ask me, you're both highly overrated." Snicker. Brian sighs, "Everybody's a critic." I'd be a little more concerned, if I were Brian. So much for the street rep, ya know? TDN follows Brian as he opens the door...and there's Jennifer, about ready to knock. Gasp! Brian's still naked. Jennifer is discombobulated. Brian acts like nothing's amiss. Jennifer flusters, "I came at the wrong time." With a look at TDN, Brian snaps, "You two have a lot in common." TDN stomps out. Brian lollygags across the room and grabs some pants. Jennifer follows him in and mumbles, "This place is very...glamorous." Brian replies that it "does the trick." Jennifer: "I'm sure." Jennifer tells him she's a realtor now, if he ever feels like selling. Brian cuts to the chase and says that Justin isn't there. Jennifer knows that, which is why she came over. She wants to ask a favor. Brian points out that he already did her a favor. Jennifer's like, uh, not the right one: "This one's for him. I want you to take him." Brian wonders what the hell she's talking about, while I start to get very, very afraid. Jennifer says that Justin won't let anyone near him, that he shows no emotion unless he's throwing a temper tantrum, and that he's having nightmares: "But that's not even the worst part. The worst part is standing there, helpless. Do you have any idea what that feels like?" Rather than explore that, Brian asks what she wants him to do. Jennifer actually says, "Touch him. Help him be touched." Brian asks straight out if she wants him to have sex with Justin. Jennifer sighs, "You're the one he trusts. If that's what it takes." Give me a fuckin' break. She's going to trust her son's emotional well-being to Liberty Street's Official Fuckwit? What, does her alimony not cover the cost of professional, experienced therapy? Brian reminds her that she didn't even want them to see each other. Jennifer says she still doesn't, but she thinks this is the only chance to get Justin back to normal. Unbelievable.