Oh, Horvie!
Maybe!
Someday!
When Season Three is done,
Somehow, some way
Our plotlines won't be dumb.
In reruns!
Forever!
And ever we will see.
Oh, please.
Did I mention my son was gay?
Oh, Horvie.

Horvie, my darlin',
You hurt me real bad.
My eyeshadow's blue.
But Horvie,
You gotta believe me when I say
Fucking shit cocksucking bitch too.

And Vic's just fine!
But he's not mine!
I date just drag queens
Why, yie, yie, fuck, why
I'm lonely? Oh, Horvie.

Horvie.
HOOOOOOORVIE!!!

Why, yie, yie, yie.
I need more blush.

Ben and Michael are getting into bed. Ben: "You're making too big a deal." Michael: "Too big a deal? You practically DIED!" But luckily Ben hasn't lost a single pound in that week-long hospital stay during which his pancreas shut down or whatever happened. Still has thighs of steel. Michael says he still wakes up in the middle of the night to listen to Ben breathe. Does Michael live with Ben now? Did that happen and I've just forgotten? How does Emmett keep that apartment all to himself, now that he tossed his millions into the shitter? Ben says Michael can bench his ass if it's that important. Michael says he has to worry about everyone. He worries about Vic, Ted, Emmett, Brian, and Justin. Ben asks if he worries about what hot trick Brian and Justin will fuck next. Michael moans that he saw Justin kissing some guy. Ben says he kisses guys all the time. "You do?" Michael says over-actingly. Ben says he kisses them hello and goodbye and stuff. Michael gives Ben a soul kiss and says that's the kind of kiss he saw Justin give some guy. I hope he pulls out some dolls and shows Ben what kind of touch he saw Justin give the other boy, too. On his wee-wee. Ben realizes he's not getting any sex, so he asks Michael if Justin knows Michael saw him. Michael says that he was across the street. He asks if he should tell Brian. "Absolutely not," Ben says. Michael asks if this is Rule #2 of gay etiquette: never tell your best friend that you saw his boyfriend cheating on him. What's with this "gay etiquette" stuff? Are they trying to start a catchphrase? Ben says that if Michael's wrong, Brian will be furious. "And if I'm right?" Michael asks. "He'll be even furiouser." Them there's some good speakin', right there. Michael bitches that he loses either way, since there's no way Brian would end up going home with Michael. Ben complains that Michael's going to sit up and worry all night long. Michael says it's genetic.