The camera rushes past and then settles on Brian's latest trick. Why do all of the extras on this show look like a cross between Dr. Dave and Ben? It's all square jaw and brown hair. I want variety! I want Brian to have an enormous blond German once in a while, crushing him like clay. Is that so wrong? The guy wants another go-round with Brian, but Brian's not having it. He's got these new rules, remember. He can only fuck once, and no kissing. So he comes off as an asshole to this guy, giving him the brush-off, telling him to get out of his apartment. Brian pushes him away with the antenna of the cordless phone, but then it's gone in the next shot. The trick figures out that Brian's got a boyfriend. He tells Brian that he used to have that open-door policy with an ex-boyfriend. He warns Brian that when you leave the door open, you never know who's going to walk in or out. Brian quickly tells the man to take the stairs instead of the freight elevator. "Cutting it a little close, aren't you?" he quips as he leaves.
Justin and his mom arrive in the elevator just as the trick disappears down the stairs. Jennifer beams to Brian about some sale she found. Justin kisses Brian and can instantly taste another man on him. "Looks like you picked up a few things," Brian says to Justin. "You too," Justin responds. Justin is wearing fashion we've been missing since Back to the Future. Jennifer cheers that she just sold a house. Nobody ever listens to her, so she has to congratulate and celebrate herself. She says she decided to splurge and buy her son some new clothes. Justin leaps over the couch and pulls a condom wrapper from behind the cushions. Does that mean that's where they normally keep the used condom wrappers? Justin says he's way too old to go shopping with his mom. Brian says he's not if Jennifer is paying. Jennifer isn't really paying attention to Brian and Justin because she's going through the neverending bag of clothes she just bought as Brian and Justin do a comedy routine over her head. Justin inspects the sheets. Brian yells that he hopes Jennifer remembered to buy Justin some "rubbers." Justin finds a pair of underwear. "For the rainy days," Brian adds. Jennifer is as unamused as I am. Justin hides the underwear behind his back as his mother holds up a sweater for him to inspect. She tells him he can wear it to Daphne's party. "I'm not going to the hetero hop with a bunch of beer-chugging breeders," he says, adding a lisp I've never heard him use before. And nice language, Justin. Your asshole boyfriend teach you that? Oh right, he did. Jennifer tells Justin that he's got to meet friends his own age. She adds a "nothing personal" to Brian, but it's not necessary. Brian says he agrees. "Youth should be savored," he notes. Sometimes Brian sounds like a serial killer. It's the complete lack of inflection in his voice. Meanwhile, Justin's sniffing something he found on the floor. Is that a washcloth? He's sniffing the cum cloth? Yikes, that's the grossest thing I've ever seen. Jennifer is going on about how she was pretty wild in her high school days. She makes this arm motion when she talks about how crazy she was that makes her incredibly endearing. Justin throws the cum cloth at Brian's head as Jennifer ducks down to get more clothing. Brian jokes that the "wild" thing must run in the family.