Back to Brian and Justin. They're in bed. Brian's straddling Justin and giving him a hand job, but warns him not to come yet. He asks Justin what he likes to do. "I don't know. Watch TV. Play Tomb Raider." Okey doke, Justin's just a kid. He's a virgin. He's new. We get it. Brian asks him what he likes to do in bed. Justin professes not to be picky. He's versatile, "and ambidextrous, which makes it really hard to decide which hand to throw with." Sigh. No, really, WE GET IT. Brian asks him if he likes to rim. Justin says sure. Brian, knowing Justin has no clue, and not moving an inch, tells him to go for it. Brian's cell phone rings at this moment. From the one-sided conversation, we can figure out that whoever it is has been trying to reach him for a while, but he was out, and whatever happened just happened and Brian needs to get wherever. He's pretty coordinated himself --- he continues jerking Justin off during the whole conversation, which ends up being a bad thing, because Justin comes all over Brian and the bed. Brian, of course, yells at him for it. "It'll wash out, won't it?" Justin asks, worried. "I mean, you should see my sheets at home." I'll bet.
Back at Michael and Emmett's apartment, Michael's hooking up with the Cruiser. Emmett walks through on his way back to his room, and Michael explains that Emmett's lived with him ever since a hooker burned down his apartment building two years ago. He doesn't say if the hooker was gunning for Emmett, or if it was just an unfortunate baking accident, or what, and now I'm damn curious. Michael reaches into the back of the man's jeans and pulls out...a fake butt. The guy's actually proud of it, telling Michael it's called "The Butt," and he got it out of a catalogue. Michael doesn't quite know what to say. But he, too, is saved by the ringing of the phone.
It's Brian: "It's happened. I'm picking you up in ten minutes. I need you." No "Hi, how you doing? Sorry to call so late." None of that. People have such horrible phone manners these days. Or it could just be Brian. Michael says he's "kind of got [my] hands full," right now. The Rubber Booty Buddy Bugger (â„¢Shack) pulls a fake penis out of the front of his jeans. "It's called 'The Bulge,'" he says. "If you get them together, there's a discount." Jesus.
Brian hears the Cruiser in the background, and starts to tease Michael about having someone over. "I can't believe it," Brian says. "You should be here," Michael replies. Snerk. "Fuck the shit out of him," Brian tells him. Michael, still holding the fake butt as a shield against RBBB, yells, "No! Pick me up!" He hangs up, then tells RBBB that he has to go, but they'll definitely reschedule, no ifs, ands or -- he winces and hands him "The Butt."