The PrideFest Parade! HDGBs! Drag queens! Rainbow flags, banners, posters, of every shape and size! Justin and Brian watch from the sidelines. Randy Harrison has perfected the art of looking nervous in public places. Justin grumps that he didn't want to be there in the first place. Brian replies, "Well, you're here. And you're queer. So..." Justin grouses, "It's just a big freak show!" Brian snorts, "Oh, did you think you were going to find pride at the parade?" Justin stamps his foot and wonders what the hell they're doing there, then? Brian sighs, "I'm just making sure Chris Hobbes doesn't win." Justin looks slightly less uncomfortable. Brian orders him to go march with Jennifer.
After Justin takes off, Brian sees Ted walking by and calls him over. Where's Dick? Ted says he couldn't make it. Brian nods, "Ohh, I thought he didn't want to be seen with this year's pity fuck." Ted's like, how did you know? Brian knows Dick. Dick was what Brian was doing when he was supposed to be at Gus's bris. Ted thanks Brian for the warning, not! Brian snorts, "Act like a pussy, get treated like a pussy." Ted shrieks that he's not a pussy! Brian mocks Ted by waving an invisible flag and muttering, "Happy Pride, how's it going?" Ted scowls. Brian gives him a suggestion: "Next time, try this: 'I'm going to rip your fucking clothes off, and make you sit on my nine-inch dick.'" Ted says he doesn't have a nine-inch dick. Well, duh, Ted. As Brian puts it, "If you're good, he won't care." Brian dares him to try it. Ted wanders off, muttering the line over and over. Brian spots some random dude and drawls, "Hello, sweetheart." Lindsay walks up, holding Gus, and grins, "Hear that, Gus? Daddy called you 'sweetheart.'" St. L.'s changed into a yellow halter top, yellow leather pants, and yellow sunglasses. She hands the baby to Brian. Brian's impressed by the get-up and says, "Whoa, Mama." Lindsay snaps, "Well, Mama needs a few hours off. To be with her Mama." She spots the Dykes on Bikes group tooling down the road. She walks up to Melanie, who's wearing a tank top that says "Mutha" on it. I want one of those. Where do you get one of those? Melanie sees her fiancée and whistles, "Whoa, baby!" Lindsay asks if they can ride together. Melanie slaps her on the ass and growls, "Honey, I love it when we ride together." Lindsay grabs the extra helmet conveniently located on the back of Mel's bike, and hops on. Leda's grinning to beat the band. And she's a marriage counselor, too. Wow. Melanie asks where Gus is, and Lindsay points to Brian, who screams, "You owe me for this!" Snicker. Mel and L kiss, and Leda gives the signal to "rev 'em up!" Brian's finding it hard to make time with anyone while he's holding a squalling baby, especially with Ted delightfully pointing Gus out to anyone passing by.