Emmett's eating from a jar of his dead boyfriend's pickles as Ted tries to talk him into going to the porn awards: "When the Granada Inn is transformed into an X-rated Xanadu." Man, how does that sound like fun or class? Ted's so gross. He tells Emmett that there's the Governor's Ball after the show where every porn star will be live in attendance. "Only this time," Ted beams, "you're one of them, Emmett." Emmett really just wants to mourn the death of his boyfriend. Ted doesn't care. Emmett says when he put Pickle's sweater on, he feels like Pickle's arms are still around him. The smell of vanilla combined with dill. Ted says that Pickle wouldn't want Emmett to be a hermit. Emmett points out that Pickle was one for years, and now he understands why. Ted sits next to Emmett and says those people can't take his pride or they've won. He says it's more important that Emmett go out and celebrate. Emmett asks if he's supposed to celebrate the fact that he whacked off on a porn website. Ted says, "You made a lot of people happy. Especially George." Emmett apologizes. Ted gives up and says he'll accept the Crystal Dick for Emmett, and he'll tell the world how proud he is of Emmett.
Justin and Michael are out having drinks, bitching about what Brian did: "At least we backed everything up on your hard drive or else we'd really be fucked." Wait, so those were just printouts that Brian pissed on? Then what's the fucking problem? Brian probably paid for those pieces of paper and that computer ink anyway. Justin complains that it's going to cost a couple hundred dollars to reprint everything. Michael says they'll send Brian the bill. Oh, like he didn't pay for it the first time when they used his computer. Michael starts justifying Brian's actions, saying they did exclude him, and that he can act irrationally when he's angry. Justin says they were working. "In his place, in his face," Michael rhymes. He points out that they fell asleep together. Justin says it's not like they were fucking. Michael says even a superhero can morph into a jerk. Where is that line coming from? It's like stuff's getting cut but they don't bother piecing the script back together in a logical line. Justin says he can't believe Michael's going to forgive Brian. He says that Mikey puts up with anything. Michael says he's not going to this time, even though he will and already has. Justin says he's been fooling himself into thinking that Brian loves him. Michael tells Justin that Brian really does love him. I don't understand this next line: "You saw his face this morning. We could have removed his teeth with pliers and he would have let us." Because he was so stone-faced? Justin says they should have, since he deserves it. Michael says now they know that Rage has a fatal weakness, and it's not kryptonite. What a loser.