Queer as Folk U.S.
Smells Like Codependence

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Brian, Brian, Brian, Oy, Oy, Oy

Brian walks out in the parking lot. A hot, scruffy guy in a brown leather jacket and blue jeans calls out to him, "Do you remember me?" Not hardly. Hot Scruffy Guy is just another man Brian's fucked and forgotten. Brian looks him over and sneers, "I must have been very desperate." Ill-mannered bastard. Hot Scruffy Guy doesn't take that too well. Brian just hops into his jeep and screeches away, followed by Hot Scruffy Guy's curses.

At a dark intersection, Brian pulls up to the light, mightily pissed off and frustrated. He leans over to take out the tape he's listening to, and is busy looking for another one, when a car zooms up and rams him from behind. Brian bounces off the dashboard, leaving him with a big gash on his forehead. The car backs up, and then zooms forward again. Brian yells, "What are you doing, you crazy fuck?!" The car hits his again, breaking all the glass out of the windows and practically popping the top off, and then speeds off into the night.

The next day, David and Mike are having sex in the woods. Ew. And there's birds chirping, and purple flowers everywhere, and it's just like those feminine spray commercials, and it's all bad, y'all. Mike giggles about having never been good at outdoor sports. Or something; I didn't catch it all because I was too busy wincing. They start to cuddle, as much as two people can while trying to keep as wide a distance between them as possible and yet still give the illusion of cuddling. All right. I'm brave. I'm strong. Gotta pay attention. Phew! Okay, so Mike says that he was really nervous about coming up there, but it's been great. David's like, oh the places they could go next! Skiing! New York! Europe! "There's a whole world outside of Liberty Avenue. I'd like to show it to you, if you'd let me." Dave says, feigning affection. Then he jumps up and tries to get Mike to swim with him in the nearest lake, or pond, or aqueduct, or what-have-you. We get a magnificent beauty shot of Chris Potter's butt as he runs to the lake/pond/aqueduct, whooping the whole way. Mike says that he'll be right behind him, and then finds his cell phone in his pants.

Mike calls Brian, who's lying back in his bed, all bandaged up, smoking a doobie that I'm sure isn't doctor-prescribed. Mike's all happy and excited; they made love in the woods, it was incredible, yada yada. When Mike says that he's never had sex outside before, Brian reminds him of the back alley at Babylon. Brian's all biting and drawling, so Mike asks what's up. Brian's like, oh...nothing...but Mike finally gets the accident out of him that Brian blames Hot Scruffy Guy because Brian wouldn't have sex with him again. Brian has a gash on his forehead and a slight concussion: "But I'm all right," Brian sighs, "So don't even THINK about cutting your trip short and coming back here." Manipulative asswipe. Brian hangs up the phone, leaving a very worried Mikey on his stomach in the woods, like a baby on a blanket. Dr. Dave returns, and asks what's up. Mike looks at him apprehensively

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Queer as Folk U.S.

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