The once and future home of Mike and Emmett. I'm still saying he's coming back. Ted sighs, "Well, we knew he was too good to be true." Emmett's done some redecorating -- lots more tinsel and shiny things. Emmett adds, "Men. They're all the same." Ted amends, "Except for you, Michael." Emmett continues, "You are a saint." Mike: "I don't want to be a saint. I want to be a ruthless, heartless shit who fucks whoever he wants without regret or remorse." Brian sing-songs, "I'm sorry, that position has already been filled." Ha! Mike says that he wasn't talking about Brian; he was talking about Dr. Demon. I think Brian knew that, Mikey, but thanks. Emmett brings in a box of pizza, and tells Mike to cut Demon loose: "Show him you're too good for him. He doesn't deserve you." Brian asks who Mike does deserve, exactly. Not you, either, so don't get any ideas. Emmett: "Someone who will cherish him. Who will be faithful? Someone for whom he will be the sun and the moon and the stars." Brian asks Emmett what Bette Davis movie he's living in, and then asks Mike, "And what did you think would happen -- that you would be monogamous forever?" Well, yeah. I really don't think Mike was coming up with that all by himself. Emmett sneers that that is so like Brian, "to make some vile, homophobic crack." Brian doesn't get the homophobic part, so Emmett explains, "Just because we're gay, it's not possible for us to have a loyal, loving relationship?" Oooh, Emmett's wearing one of my favorite t-shirts; it reads, "Jesus is coming. Look busy." I was down in Dupont Circle last Sunday having lunch with a friend, and saw a t-shirt in a store window that had a "For Rent" sign printed with a space right under it where you could pen in your phone number. Totally thought of Emmett. Had to be dragged away before I went in and bought it and shipped it to Peter Paige. Still thinking of doing it anyway. Thanks for listening. Brian says that it's not because they're gay, it's because they're men. Again, no comment. Let's just say that I may accept that that's a little closer to the truth, but I am in no way, shape, or form comfortable with an overall generalization of that kind. Got that? Good. Ted adds that it's not different for straight guys -- he read somewhere that sixty-four percent of straight men admitted that they've been unfaithful. Emmett replies haughtily, "I wouldn't know. I've only slept with thirty-two percent of them." The Boys all laugh. Except Mike, who scowls, "What, I'm supposed to let [Demon!] do whatever he wants? Whoever he wants?" Brian shrugs that he didn't say that: "But maybe you should establish some rules. Decide what's acceptable and what's not." Mike says that he doesn't think he can do that. Brian's like, fine: "Then you can move back in here." Emmett and Mike are like, what? Oh, give it up. It's inevitable. Brian, snorts derisively, "End it all over a hand job."