Walking outside with Brian, Mike says he doesn't even know why he's asking Brian's advice. Brian says it's because he's "younger and wiser." Try again, babe. Mike adds that Brian has never been in a relationship. Brian says that he really hates the word "relationship." Mike says he has no idea what it's like. Brian says, "I know he told you the truth. And I've got to give him credit." Whatever. If Brian hadn't seen Demon, Mike would never know. Brian adds that he was sure that Demon wouldn't tell, and Mike's like, wait, you knew? Brian's like, it's math, do it -- where were both Demon and I last night? Mike swears, and then asks Brian whether he and his Demon lover hooked up. Brian says no. Mike's like, and you weren't going to tell me? Brian points out that, if he had, Mike would have just thought Brian was trying to break them up. Mike shakes his head and growls, "Well, if he can do it, maybe I should, too." Brian tells him to go for it: "Only stop carrying on like some betrayed little housewife." I'm still not getting how, you know, the only viable option is for Mike to screw around on Demon. "Leave him" doesn't even seem to be on the table, anymore. But I guess my happiness is not the question here, either.
The Gas Station. Ted goes inside to pay for the pump, but can't find his wallet. La Traviata plays faintly in the background as Symbolism stumbles out of my bathroom, dramatically trips over a snag in the carpet, and tries to grab my last cider. Can you believe that shit? Patience quietly tsk-tsks on the couch. Ted looks in his car. No wallet. He gets this look on his face like, oh, no.
Back at his apartment, Ted tears the place apart, looking for the missing wallet. No dice. Blake walks in at the absolutely worst time. Ted asks him where he's been. Blake says he went out to get Ted the three-disc set of Thais. Blake: "I asked the guy at the store if he knew another good opera about a slut." Hee! Ted says that the set is expensive, but Blake replies that he didn't care how much it cost. Ted says that he does, and asks Blake how he managed to pay for it. Blake cautiously replies that he tracked down a friend who owed him some money. Ted replies, "And you spent all of it on me." In a small, confused voice, Blake answers, "Not all of it." Ted's had enough: "Look, you can keep the cash, I don't care about that. But please give it back to me so I don't have to cancel my cards." Blake has no idea what he's talking about. Ted snaps, "God, you must think that I am so pathetic. My wallet, that's what I'm talking about." Blake swears that he didn't take Ted's wallet. Ted sneers that he believes Blake: "It just walked out on its own. So, if you happen to see it out walking around in the streets, would you please ask it to come home?" He orders Blake to get out. Blake asks where he should go, and Ted screams, "Wherever you would have gone if I hadn't picked you up off that restroom floor, taken you to the hospital, and brought you back here!" Well, off to Hell you go, then. Don't forget your snowball. Blake, blinking back tears, asks Ted about the clothes he gave him. Ted tells Blake to keep them, and then gives him back Thais: "Return this for the money your 'friend' gave you. I already have it." He slams the door on the way out.