Queer as Folk U.S.

Episode Report Card
Camper: B+ | 774 USERS: C+
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Ted's Not Dead

Justin and Daphne on Justin's bed. No, not like that, although this could be the beginning of some sort of parallel to Brian and Lindsay's relationship. How clever. Not. Justin's just related his sordid tale about Chris Hobbes in the Athletic Room. Daphne's skeptical: "But I thought you were in love with that Brian guy." I cannot tell you how cool it is that she isn't impressed by Brian. Justin, like he's grown: "Me and Chris -- that's not love, Daphne, that's fucking." Oh, puhleeze. Daphne giggles, "Oh, and I thought it was detention." Well, watching Justin is always a little bit like detention, Daphy. Trust me. Justin's mom enters; Daphne leaves. Mrs. Taylor -- finally, a last name! -- asks Justin if he's late for art club. Justin says he quit. His mom is all upset -- Justin loves art club. In his most bratty voice -- you know, the one with the snooty inflection -- he says he's just not interested any more. Since when? Why just last week -- Justin, with a sigh, rolls his eyes and tells her, "You don't know everything about me. A week is, like, a long time. Things can change in a week." Look who knows so much just because he got laid a couple of times. Mrs. Taylor: "Well, I came in to tell you I'm going to Niketown, but you're probably not interested in that, either." Justin looks at her shyly: is it too late to change his last answer? His mom smiles, and tells him he can even drive.

Liberty Diner. Mike smiles as he watches Debbie behind the counter. Aww, so sweet. Debbie finally sees him, waves joyfully, and walks over, asking him why he's smiling at her. Mikey's all sentimental, telling her it's that thing she does when she rubs her nose, kind of like a sleepy five-year-old. Debbie knows what's up: "People wake up from comas, sweetheart." Mike's still not too sure, even when Debbie reminds him that his Uncle Vic was in a coma for ten days, "and I was sure that I'd lost him. And I couldn't even tell our mother because she didn't know it was AIDS" -- yeah, yeah, all you people who guessed "AIDS" get nothing, because, seriously, how obvious was that? -- "and I wanted to hear all about the tunnel, and the white light, and did Aunt Theresa get to heaven, and the first words out of his mouth: did I miss the Golden Globes?" Hah! Good thing he didn't miss the Oscars -- he probably would have gone right back into a coma. Debbie asks about Ted, Mike says there's been no change, but he's going back to the hospital later. Debbie kisses him, crying, and packs up some food for him to take to Ted's mom. Turkey meatloaf and lemon bars. That sounds great. And there's a diner down the street. But, aw man, it's snowing, and I can't drive in the snow. I gotta learn how to cook. ["Dude, now I want lemon bars and I just had pizza an hour ago." -- Wing Chun]

Queer as Folk U.S.

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