Queer as Folk U.S.
The Ties That Bind

Episode Report Card
Camper: B+ | Grade It Now!
Ouch! That's Gotta Hurt.

Babylon! Let the Leather Ball commence! HDGBs dance, cavort, and suck face, sporting the latest in leather codpieces, leather collars, leather caps, leather bikinis. Not much in the way of pants, though. Excuse me while I faint from shock.

Whew! Right. Where were we? Hey, they've found some black people in Toronto. Good for them. Up on a balcony, T&E watch the debauchery below. Ted's wearing jeans and a polo shirt, like always. He groans to Emmett, "I can't believe you went out dressed like that." Emmett, leaning against the balcony bars, but facing Ted, replies, "My mother used to say, 'Find your best feature and play it for all it's worth.'" He then turns around. And, yes, he's wearing leather pants with the seat cut out. Sigh. And no offense, or anything, but that's not his best feature. Mama's going to be disappointed. Emmett carps on Ted for not dressing up at all. Ted pathetically claims that he's wearing a leather belt. Emmett replies, "You are such a stick in the mud!" Ladies and Gentlemen, Please welcome This Week's Hammer. Hold your applause, please. Ted grumps, "Why, just because I don't want to look like a cross between a storm trooper and Roy Rogers?" Emmett, looking around, replies, "Stop it, you're giving me a hard-on." Two men walk by, one dragging the other by a leash and collar. Emmett muses, "I hope he's housebroken." Ha! Brian stalks up to them, encased in leather and puffing on a stogie. He grabs Emmett from behind: "Hello, Big Bottom! How would you like to polish mah boots with your tongue?" Emmett cracks up. Ted rolls his eyes, "Like I said." Emmett's surprised to see Brian there; doesn't he have "Gus" this weekend? Brian says that he found a sitter. Ted tells them both to have fun; he's going home: "To my leather recliner. That's about as kinky as I get." He's distracted by hooting and hollering below: the S&M show is about to start! Fascinated, he watches a man in a mask whip another man tied to...I don't know, some sort of Tree of Pain. Close-ups of butt-cheeks clenching. Close-ups of the whip going back and forth. Close-up of Ted, wide-eyed and horrified, but unable to look away. Back to the Butt-ClenchCam, and seriously, dude, quit redialing 411, the line's busy, okay? When the whipper (I know nothing about this scene, and I'm not even going to pretend to want to) removes his mask and unties the other guy, Emmett gasps, "Oh, my God, isn't that...?" Ted whispers, shocked, "Dale Wexler!" Emmett grins, "Well, now you know one of his secrets, dontcha?"

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Queer as Folk U.S.




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