Queer as Folk U.S.
…Wherever That Dream May Lead You

Episode Report Card
Camper: B+ | Grade It Now!

Q-Mart. Mike runs in, adjusting his tie. Tracy -- whose hair has thankfully grown out since last week -- asks where he's been, and warns that His Awfulness has been asking about him. Off-camera, Andrew snarls, "Nice of you to join us, Novotny." Mike apologizes. Awful Andrew snipes, "Maybe waltzing in anytime you please was okay when you were running things, but I'm in charge now." Tracy and Mike glare at him. Mike apologizes with a little more force this time. His Royal Assholeness says that he isn't trying to give Mike a hard time -- it's just that Andrew depends on Mike a lot. For example, some kid just threw up in the store, and who could do clean-up detail better than Michael? Mike sucks it up and says he'll get to it right away; Andrew slithers off. Tracy wants to know how Mike puts up with all this crap. Mike's too frustrated to answer.

PIFA. Justin is still in the same room, trying to finish his sketch. The Dean of the school walks in to discuss Justin's problems in class earlier. Wow, the Dean wants to talk to him already? They must have a really long wait list. Justin says that there's not a problem! His hand just get tired sometimes, but that's it. Justin even quotes his occupational therapist, who assured him that the strength in Justin's hands will come back. The Dean asks to see his sketch. Justin protests that it's not finished. The Dean flips through the sketchpad with concern. Justin looks down. The Dean says that Justin's very talented, but that the program is pretty strenuous, and Justin might want to consider whether he's up to it. Dude. It's the first day. Ouch. Having dropped that lovely bit of goodness and light, Dean Larsen walks out with a smile.

Mike walks into Buzzy's comic-book store, looking like he just made it home. Buzzy asks Mike how it's going. Mike says it's much better now, thanks, and did Buzzy get a chance to order the Justice League comic that Mike wanted? Buzzy says he did, but that it might not get there in time. In time for what? Buzzy's moving to Florida at the end of the month. Permanently. And closing the store. "Twenty years is long enough. I'm going to kick back, smoke some weed. Do some fishing. Maybe I'll start up a band. That's always been a dream of mine." Mike pastes on the Dumb And Happy Smile, and wishes Buzzy good luck, but oh, man.

Babylon! Okay, let's see if I can describe this right. Men dressed in silver bodysuits with wide wing-sleeves and antennaed silver skullcaps, looking like eight-foot-tall galactic butterflies, dance around on the raised platforms. There also seem to be gigantic Japanese fans involved. I don't know what to tell you. The Boys watch from the usual stairway. Emmett tells Ted that he's proud of him for getting up and getting out, finally. And getting a job. Ted says it's all thanks to Brian. Brian shrugs that he just told Oliver that Ted was really boring, which is apparently like crack in Accountant World. Ted thanks him anyway: "In fact, out of the six billion people in the world, I'm sure that I rank somewhere below the countries of Zambia and Zimbabwe, but if there's anything I can do to return the favor...." Brian says that there is: just ignore him when they're at work, all right? Ted's like, that will be no problem. Brian offers Mike a bump, but Mike angrily pushes it away. What's his problem? Mike grouses that his favorite comic-book shop is closing because the owner's moving to Florida: "Even fucking Buzzy has a dream." Ted asks, because he didn't quite hear that, "Who's fucking Buzzy?" Brian snerks, "No one. I've seen him." Emmett's like, aren't there any other comic-book stores in Pittsburgh? Well, yeah, but Buzzy's was Mike's place. He'd been going there since he was ten years old. Oh, I'm feelin' him. I remember the day they closed down my favorite comic-book store. I came home from college one day, and there it wasn't. And any time I drive by, I still feel this little...sob! Justin walks in, looking for Brian. He's obviously hopped up on something. Brian gives him a big kiss, then asks why Justin isn't home getting ready for school. Justin says that he isn't going. Emmett grimaces, "Let me guess -- you heard that they're going to make you draw vaginas?" Justin's like, no, I quit. Yeah, you heard him. Justin shrugs, "Well, I can't draw anymore, so what's the point of wasting my time. When I could be here, popping pills and drinking beer and sticking my gimp hand down guys' pants." To illustrate, he sticks his hand down an HDGB's pants and asks him if he wants to dance. The HDGB is all, oh, yeah, baby! They boogie off, and Mike asks Brian what the hell that was. Brian grimly replies, "Pain management."

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Queer as Folk U.S.




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