Queer as Folk U.S.
…Wherever That Dream May Lead You

Episode Report Card
Camper: B+ | Grade It Now!

Big Q-Mart. The Truck Guys are teasing Mike about dressing up as a clown. Tracy shoos them away. Then Awful Andrew shows up with the clown suit again, because Mike did such a "great" job the first time. Mike refuses to don the ruffles. Andrew's like, you don't get to refuse, I'm the manager! Mike snorts, yeah, like he could ever forget that: "What you can't forget is that the only reason you have this job is because I left. My only mistake was that I should never have come back!" Andrew insists that Mike put on the clown suit. Mike refuses once more. Andrew smirks that Mike had better, or else he's fired. Shyeah, don't threaten Mike with a good time. Mike gets in Andrew's face and snaps, "Fuck. You." Mike walks past him, gives Tracy a kiss goodbye, then grabs Andrew and kisses him, too, fast and hard. "So long, Loverboy," Mike purrs, lifting a knowing eyebrow. Andrew's in shock. Neeter, neeter, neeter, you kissed a gu-uy! Mike tosses off his tie and gleefully runs out of the store.

Liberty Diner. Justin carries two coffee carafes, warning, "Hot stuff coming through!" Debbie pinches his butt and crows, "No kidding! Woo!" Debbie needs new material, because Justin is less than amused. Lindsay sits at the counter watching Emmett eat a donut with a knife and a fork. What's Lindsay doing here? In the middle of the day? Without Melanie? Or the baby? Is she working or not? Anyway, Lindsay's never seen anyone eat pastry with a knife and fork. Is that a southern thing? Emmett says no, it's more of a trying to survive with six brothers and sisters thing. He tells Lindsay to try and grab the donut. She does, and Emmett nearly spears her hand with the fork. He explains that it was the best way to protect his food when he was a kid. As Lindsay laughs, Emmett asks Justin for coffee. Justin tries to pour the coffee into Emmett's cup, but he loses control and he spills all over the counter. Debbie sympathetically tells him to give his hand a rest. Justin snaps at her -- snaps, okay -- for her to "mind [her] own fucking business!" Okay, Debbie can cut in the bitch-slap line in front of me. Debbie blinks, and asks what he said. Justin repeats it. Debbie's like, yeah, I heard you, I just wanted to make sure I heard you right. Justin tells her to leave him the fuck alone. Debbie pulls him aside. She knows what's happening to him sucks, and she's not going to try to blow sunshine up his ass about it, "because if anyone had [done that to her] when Vic was dying, [she] would have punched them right in the fucking mouth. All [Justin] can do at a time like this is just hang on until the scenery changes." She says that, until then, you know, just let her handle the coffee, okey doke? Justin smiles wanly. Oh, and another thing; she adds, "The next time you talk to me like that, I'm going to rip you a new butthole so big you can stick a cannon up your ass." These people sure have strange ideas about punishment. Lindsay walks up to Justin and smiles, "Something tells me you need a break."

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Queer as Folk U.S.




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