So, only one of them died. But you won't guess which one! It is Miranda, the coolest one. So she's dead. Luke and Olivia waste no time in making a lot of noise about this, despite not giving a shit about Miranda who they barely even met, and we get an eye- and earful of the Twins's Mom as she goes after first Remy's Dad (for publicizing her possible husbandcide) and then the Chief of Police (presumably for suspecting but not proving her husbandcide).
The Grunwald strong-arms Collins into taking Caleb home with them, so at least he's got a place to live for now, and then he has a dream where dead Miranda appears and tells him to go get her purse out of Remy's totaled car. Even though he doesn't believe in nonsense, he's still determined to get that purse. But nobody told him and Remy that the junkyard was haunted, so then they almost die.
There are clues suggesting Collins and the Twins's mom were having an affair, so maybe that's how their dad, the Mayor, got stabbed to death. But Olivia doesn't have time for that shit, because it turns out she is Homecoming Queen! Yeah, somewhere between getting slushied and drowned, Tess drummed up enough support that she won! Then it all goes to hell because it turns out Tess is having secret makeouts with that dude Springer, who has the weird obsession with being mean to their family.
Speaking of weird obsessions with being mean, Luke is still all over Caleb for no reason, and very against Remy striking up a friendship with him. While he's living at the mortuary, for the time being at least, he'll be going to school with them. (Their school is named after a Lovecraft character, so chew on that for a second.) After Luke saves them from the many perils of the haunted junkyard, he tries to start shit with Caleb. At no point, however, does he explain that he is also being haunted by a haunted weightroom at school, or bullied by the omnipresent and very shitty Springer.
That night, Olivia confronts her mom about a possible divorce and affair, but Mom's not having it. Meanwhile, Remy is sleepwalking into traffic at night, which goes well with her mom's night terrors but not so well with the fact that her dad clearly knows a lot more than he's telling. None of this is half as crazy as the fact that suddenly Miranda shows up in Caleb's bedroom, fully dead but still ready to chill.
What we know is that the demon girl was something only Miranda could see, and is still after her -- and all five of them -- and probably this is a Final Destination situation where Death will be coming back around for them when it can, and that this is possibly a consequence of Remy's mom living through Afghanistan. So now they still have to figure out what the curse is all about, once they get Luke to admit something is going on, but at least they have dead adorable Miranda ghosting around to help with that.
But what we really know now is that this show is about modernizing the Gothic Romance, which helps explain a lot. If you enjoyed Spencer and her candlestick roaming the halls of Radley, or the Brookhaven Doll Hospital, or the ghostly passageways and necropolis streets of the PLL Halloween Special, then that is what we are doing, I think: We are doubling down on that. Which frankly seems like a splendid idea.
Next Week: To get Luke onboard, the remaining Cursed Teens hold a séance in which little is probably revealed. Miranda's funeral has quite a turnout, considering nobody knows who the hell she is. Olivia goes digging where she should not be digging. Everybody's parents and parental figures act shifty, some more. And The Grunwald continues to rule 100 percent of the time.
Everybody died! It was because of a gross demon girl that only Miranda can see. The Matheson Twins and their mom are the Toby Cavanaughs of town, a real rum bunch ever since Mom stabbed Dad; Remy's hot on the trail of the weird Curse that killed everybody; and Uncle Collins is all kinds of vampire nonsense. But The Grunwald abides.
After some quick work by the EMTs -- thanks for saving Olivia, dudes! -- everybody is dry and freaking out, except Miranda. So they sit around and bitch about Miranda.
Olivia: "Nice work killing all of us, Remy!"
Remy: "It was Miranda! I was just grooving to the Civil Wars and then she starts screaming. I couldn't stop her from driving us off the road."
Caleb: "Why did she do that, do you think?"
Remy: "Listen, that bridge was completely clear of demon girls from where I was sitting."
Doctors: "Well, we're losing Miranda. I guess her coming here was a bad idea."
Miranda: "I wish I wasn't the one that got away. Bye, you guys."
And so it is that Miranda drives off that last bridge. The one we call life. Everybody cries even though nobody really dug her because they didn't know how great she was. Not even her uncle got it. Caleb got it, but it didn't help. RIP Miranda Collins.
Olivia: "It really sucked when we drowned a minute ago. But I guess it's cool that we all lived. And changed into scrubs during the title card even though our clothes were already dry."
Caleb: "So wait, I can go back to Rosewood now? I better call Hanna."
Doctor: "Remy, I need to take your blood for some reason."
Remy: "No problem."
Caleb: "Problem! You have to wait for parental consent!"
Luke: "Caleb, why are you being weird about blood samples?"
Caleb: "Because of my Rosewood PTSD! They take your blood, next thing you know they're smearing it on field hockey sticks and you're in jail for finding a shovel!"
Police Chief: "No, we actually have cops here in Ravenswood, not just high school dropout voyeurs with video cameras in a secret society."
Caleb: "Fine, I will calm down."
Remy's Parents: "Thank goodness you didn't die!"
Dad: "Luke was in the car? That pisses me off more than that car going in the river, or if you had died."
Chief: "Also, a little girl was killed. And your daughter was driving. So maybe be cool for like one second."