Ray Donovan
Housewarming

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 32 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Night Moves

Oh, Van Miller. You never disappoint.

DEONTE

While Mickey welcomes Abby, loaded down with Target bags and home d├ęcor, Ray is busting down the door of Deonte's hotel room and tossing the chick out.

Deonte: "Ass and mouth, dawg! I protected myself!"
Ray: "Then why do I have in my hand a jar of your semen?"
Deonte: "That is a salient question at any time, dawg."
Ray: "How many kids do you have, Deonte?"

Deonte names them all, proudly -- it's a dumb "Jermajesty"-type joke, but whatever works -- and Ray calls his wife so she can scream at him on speaker while they continue to hash this out: Essentially, how can a man who made thirty million last year keep being so idiotic? Deonte has no real answer. He promises not to be an idiot, but that's not a promise you can make. There's a neat button as Ray's leaving, where the scene cuts just as Deonte answers the phone with a bright "...Babe! Hey!" It's well-acted, and hilariously edited.

VAN

As Deb returns to the hospital room to find that the increasingly spooked Ezra's vanished from his bed, good old Van finally makes it home.

He takes careful steps toward the kitchen, hopping over a hot-lava area, and then down to his lair, which has been lightly tossed: All his off-brand action figures are scattered on the floor, far from their careful shelf at the foot of the stairs. Van crawls on his hands and knees to pick them up and put them back in their packaging -- "oh my friend, my friend" -- and then they start attacking. Slicing with their little plastic knives, riding around on motorcycles, crawling up the walls. It's a little terrifying.

I wonder if part of this is about connecting back to Tommy Wheeler and/or Sean Walker, the action stars in other parts of the show? How amazing would that be if this is all about his obsession with one of them and that's somehow why he hates Ezra and Lee and Ray so much. I am going to think about this forever and ever.

CHEZ BUNCHY

As Abby's setting out a lovely vase of flowers, dusting off the table in her last staging activities, Mickey and the boys come home. Terry isn't sure that Nurse Frances -- last seen going out for dinner with her secret family -- can attend, but Bunchy's more interested in Abby, meaning Ray.

Abby: "I wish we could! It's uh, movie night..."

Bunchy tries to recover, but his chin goes right to his chest. Even Mickey feels bad for him, but in his way expresses this by roughly reminding him to thank Abby for all her hard work in turning this into -- I'd say -- one-third of the shithole it was when she got there. She feels just terrible about it too, you can tell. Of course she does.

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Ray Donovan

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