Speaking of being on the right path to a career, Chris is at Scores, a ...um, gentlemen's club in Manhattan. Chris is doing a one-day internship at Scores, which I think means he doesn't have to pay the admission fee or buy the bottle service. Because while Chris wants to go into the car wash business, what he really wants to do is go into the naked car wash business. He seems to think he came up with this idea. Caroline is okay with this plan, so long as it isn't "skankalicious", which is a word she clearly picked up from Bernie Kerik. Obviously Albie takes advantage of his brother's one-day job and hits Scores for a few post-Torts class drinks. Just to support Chris, tho, ma!
Even after the epidural, Teresa is pretty miserable. Also, she feels like she has to poop. But, wait! That's not poop! That's a baby! Joe hopes he doesn't upchuck his hamburger because then he would have to eat again. The baby is born with a push and a half and no upchuck. It's a girl! And not a poop! They name her Audriana and Teresa asks if she can dress her in leopard print yet? The nurse recommends they clean her up first. Wouldn't want to muck up the baby Baby Phat with afterbirth.
Jacqueline sadly tells Chris the news that Ashley won't go see the life coach and Chris, god bless him, busts up laughing. Ashley doesn't need a life coach! She needs a beating! Dina chimes in that a few good whacks with a wooden spoon might fix a lot of problems. Jacqueline is cracking up over the thought of Chris giving Ashley a beat down, because yeah, child abuse is soooo funny. And seriously Dina? You want to promote hitting kids with wooden spoons on national television? Mama Manzo sounds like a real nice lady. Jacqueline doesn't think Ashley needs discipline, but some help with choices. Chris thinks her priorities are wonky. Then he non sequiturs that Jacqueline will give him a beat down when she finds out what's in that safe. So obviously Jacqueline then wants to see what's in the safe, because it's always just sitting there and it has never occurred to her to ask what was in it before. What, is Chris Bluebeard or something? Chris opens the safe and shows Jacqueline his gun collection. It is a gun collection that would make Charleton Heston proud, you know, if he wasn't dead. There are semi automatic rifles, uzis, handguns of all makes and models, and a few shot guns for good measure. Jacqueline giggles and starts posing like she's up for the centerfold in Guns & Ammo.