Lauren puts makeup on her friend, Kathryn, for avant-garde day at school (Make-up Designory) when her mom shows up, all proud of her for being so good at putting crazy makeup on other people. Lauren's horrified at her mother's pride in her. The scene is basically an excuse for Caroline to tell us how great her kids are. That's right, folks. This is as exciting as it gets now.
Chris and Jacqueline prepare to lecture Ashley for the nothing fight with her mom last week during poker night. Chris is really the one who seems mad about it, though, and Jacqueline thinks Ashley will respect her someday. When Ashley comes in, Chris tells her she needs to respect them, and Jacqueline just cries. Ashley apologizes for acting immature, and says she feels like an idiot. Her mom cries and tells her she's not the enemy. Ashley says she kinda wants to come home (or, you know, the producers kinda want her to; but what's the difference?). They tell her she can come home anytime, but she has to follow the rules. Jacqueline praises Chris for being the voice of reason (it's easy in this crowd). She says she started dating Chris when Ashley was five, so she always listens to him. It ends with an open invitation to come home, so that's obviously going to happen. We need the drama.
Teresa and her party planner Elvira work on her housewarming party. But only after some bickering because Teresa does the cooking, cleaning, and caring for the babies herself. Elvira admires her spotless house and then inexplicably tells her to "get some help." Well, two things: 1. Isn't a party planner "some help"? 2. When did Teresa become the down-to-earth one? Elvira's also annoyed Teresa won't get a pool in her ginormous backyard (because she already has a beach house). Elvira wants to turn Teresa's house into Studio 54, and they basically roll their eyes and hate each other until Teresa pretty much shuts the door in her face. Somehow, she doesn't fire her, though.