Real Housewives of New Jersey
Real Housewives of New Jersey

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B | 382 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
A Very Guido Christmas

That night, Jacqueline oversees the last-minute preparations for her party as the guests begin to arrive. First in are the Manzos and Greg. Next up, Teresa and Juicy arrive from their long day in court. Instead of letting things lie, Jacqueline immediately tells Teresa that there's already a story on Radar Online about Juicy's court case. Teresa fills her in on the confrontation with Monica. The way she tells it is a lot calmer than the story Juicy relays, in which Teresa was "going off on" Monica and had to be pulled away. He admits that his wife is "fuckin' nuts." Jacqueline empathizes with Teresa's actions, and Teresa adds, "I needed to silence the lamb."

As they talk, Joe Gorga and Melissa walk up to the house, agreeing that it's a shame Kathy and Rich weren't invited. Chris and Jacqueline head to the door to welcome them in as Bratshley says that "anywhere there's drama, [Jacqueline] tries to put herself in it." She adds, "Come on, she was friends with Danielle for a reason." The Gorgas head in and make their introductions, during which there is a hilarious moment that Greg is so tall the camera guy has to cut off his head to keep Joe Gorga in the shot. The Gorgas and the Giudices awkwardly greet each other. Lauren pegs Melissa as "a younger version of Teresa, and a very beautiful one at that." She thinks that Teresa belonged to Melissa from the minute they said "I do."

Albie and Joe start talking, and Joe tells Albie he needs to find someone like Melissa to get his "exercise" on with. Caroline says they're obviously of the younger generation, which cracks her up. Teresa brings up Antonia's recital and says she wishes she was invited. Mistake #1. Melissa takes a big swig of wine after telling Teresa she was upstate with the Manzos and Lauritas. She wonders, in turn, why they weren't invited to the weekend getaway. Which is really beside the point because obviously they wouldn't have gone on account of the recital, which probably would have fueled their nonsense conflict further. Still, there's not a tension-filled moment that either Teresa or Melissa won't jump on. Caroline tries to cut off this conflict at the pass, saying that they'll definitely be invited next time. Jacqueline interview that, since Teresa and Juicy are fun, and since Melissa and Joe are fun, it only makes sense that all together, they'd be fun, too. She declares, "Cut the shit and let's party." Yeah, because this party is so fun right now and not at all rife with passive-aggressive bullshit.

Real Housewives of New Jersey

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