Real Housewives of New Jersey
Public Displays of Rejection

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F@#$ It

And then we rejoin Joe and Melissa as they are heading to her big celebratory party. They talk about all the shit she's getting on Twitter for being a talentless famewhore, and Joe says, "You have to be some loser that just sits there all day and just says negative shit about someone on the Internet. I don't know if you have a job, you're not getting laid. I mean, get a life and move on!" This IS my job, fuckbrains. Caroline and Jacqueline tweeted some lovely things to Melissa, but Teresa did not. And it turns out that Teresa is so preoccupied with the impending stress of seeing Jacqueline and Caroline that she can't even delight in all of the nasty remarks about Melissa. This shows us that things must be really bad. Chris Manzo sent a sad text to Joe, and now they're going to have to make a wrestling appointment to get their feelings out or whatever.

Soon enough we're at the party, and Rosie is already wasted! Chris points out what we've all been thinking, which is that we went through an "On Display" single release party already, one whole season ago. But the song is so great, why not revisit it? Kathy talks to Caroline and Jacqueline about Jamie's wedding, and of course the subject turns to Teresa and the tabloid article in which she may or may not have said mildly disparaging things. Caroline explains that she and Teresa officially broke up as friends, and Kathy finds the whole thing to be very hurtful. She hopes that everyone can become friends again. As Caroline congratulates Melissa on her wild success in the recording industry, Jacqueline unloads on Kathy. She says that she loves Teresa, but wants to know if her friend is being honest with her.

And then Teresa arrives! She does the Teresa thing where she just acts happy and cheerful, and proceeds to completely and deliberately ignore Jacqueline in the process. Jacqueline has a sad. Meanwhile, Teresa takes Joe Gorga outside and tells him that she's ready to go to therapy with him. They both look SO JERSEY right now while having this rather gentle conversation about trying to bolster their collective mental health. It's very disconcerting. Just when it seems that Teresa might at least be open to discussing her own culpability in their strained relationship, she tells us, "I'm hoping that the therapist will help my brother realize that he's the one with the problem." If karma were real, I believe that Dr. Drew would be forced to counsel them.

Jacqueline continues to be miffed and sad as Rosie approaches Teresa with the sole purpose of telling her how hammered she is. When is Rosie going to become an official housewife? And then Melissa and her boobs address the crowd and the "On Display" remix starts to play. Some halfhearted dancing occurs, but Jacqueline can't enjoy the rhythm when she's so upset about what's happened with Teresa. She wants to go ask Teresa where they stand. Caroline is all, "Noooooooooooo!" but Jacqueline does not heed her silent plea. First Jacqueline and Teresa compare notes about who cried more, and then Teresa tells her how fucked up the ambush was. Jacqueline insists that it was not an ambush. And then for a minute Chris and Albie play Real Housewives Theater and supply their own dialogue for Jacqueline and Teresa's argument. It is surprisingly accurate and contains the gem of a line, "If you were really mad at me, you'd throw a table at my face, right?"

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Real Housewives of New Jersey




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