After a commercial break, Caroline, Jacqueline and their various family members help Albie and Christopher move into their new place. Well, most people help while Caroline supervises. Jacqueline and Chris give the boys a couch and a stripper pole. This is the moment at which, if Danielle Staub were still a cast member on this show, something disturbing and inappropriate would happen. Speaking of disturbing, if you've ever wondered what Caroline looks like in a pink feather boa, your moment has arrived. There's a knock on the door, and it's Albie's friend Greg, who is a college buddy. He has a tiny dog named Deloris, who wears a pink hoodie. Greg drops the info that he and Deloris will be living in the apartment as well, which is news to Caroline. Caroline is a staunch advocate of giving love to Deloris, but Albie is not a natural with the dogs. He is still maybe kind of my boyfriend though. I can't help it, he's straight-up cute. Deloris is impervious to Albie's charms, however. Pizza is delivered, champagne is poured in Dixie cups, and Caroline talks about how sad she's going to be without the boys at home. Lauren points out that she, too, is an entity. Caroline is not sure if she agrees. Lauren notes that she and Vito are maybe talking a little about moving in together at some point, and Albie says that Vito used to eat potato chips off of his bare stomach. Saves washing a dish, right? That's totally not a deterrent. Albie still has issues with the Vito/Lauren thing, though, clearly. Caroline tells her children that they may fight and argue, but they'll always be there for each other. And if they're not, she will kill them. If only Mama Gorga had such conviction! Caroline would never be brainwashed by the likes of Juicy Joe.

Meanwhile, Jacqueline's mom and dad have come to visit, and her mom is totally making cookies from a package. Jacqueline asks her dad for a little advice about Ashley, saying that she's an entitled nit with no work ethic and a major attitude problem. Basically, if Ashley made the slightest bit of an effort, Jacqueline would want to help her more. Jacqueline's dad asks if Ashley's ever heard her story. Jacqueline shares with us that she and Ashley's dad met when they were seventeen or eighteen. We get pictorial evidence, and boy is Jacqueline unrecognizable. Her face is like a third of the length that it is now. The couple got married and had Ashley by twenty, and divorced when Ashley was just over a year and a half old. Ashley's dad left, Jacqueline dumped all of his stuff in the courtyard, and then she moved back in with her parents. Jacqueline says that it was difficult, but she was working at the time and, one assumes, managed to get to her job on time. Ashley doesn't do that, which is frustrating.