Real Housewives of New Jersey
The Blonde Drops a Bombshell

Episode Report Card
admin: B | 26 USERS: C-
Every Unhappy Family

Previously on Masterpiece Presents: The Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Gorgas and Giudices had a family dinner but neglected to invite their parents in case they wound up killing each other; Teresa and Jacqueline reconciled in the dry Arizona air; Kathy had a "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" moment; and the entire crew agreed to collectively straighten out Penny, or as I like to call her, "…Fucking Penny."

We enter with Teresa, Juicy, and Mama Gorga heading to the showroom for the new Skinny Italian brand foods, or as I like to think they are called: Chef Boyar-dumb. Apparently, buyers from grocery stores can come to this showroom and see samples that are made either with love or with red dye #3… or perhaps a combination of the two. And if you are buying Skinny Italian foods for anything other than ironic purposes, please don't let me know about it. My fragile health can't handle such a matter. Teresa tells her mother, Antonia, that everyone had a great time in Arizona, and things are better between them now. She wants the whole family to get together for lunch, and Antonia talks about how the blood is all the time together.

Joe and his boys then go to see the Lauritas. While the kids play amongst themselves, Joe and Chris have a glass of wine. Jacqueline enters and Chris talks about how BLK water is launching some new flavors (Dirt, Silt, and Gravel, I imagine) and will do a big event called "Knock Out Autism," which involves basketball for some reason. Jacqueline will be giving a speech at the event, and seems quite nervous about it. Part of her nervousness is because she hasn't written any of the speech yet. Chris and Joe joke that she should get advice from Teresa, then laugh because obviously Teresa is an idiot. Jacqueline explains to us that she wants to be more vocal in the autism community, but also doesn't want to be judged for putting her son's autism out there publicly (e.g., for a storyline). Haters are gonna hate, says Jacqueline, and Joe Gorga sure can relate. People are making up all sorts of things about Melissa, he reminds us. But at this point he doesn't care about the BS that's floating about, and also since he blew up in Arizona he's doing just fine with Teresa and Juicy. FOR NOW.

Kathy and Richie then go to see event planner Candace Jarkow. Rich has made a pledge to shut it when it comes to Kathy's business dealings, which begs the question of why he's even there. In any case, Candace has just the thing to take Kathy's cannoli business to the next level -- an in-store demonstration at Dylan's Candy Bar, owned by Dylan Lauren, daughter of Ralph Lauren. I think that place showed up on an episode of Project Runway too. Kathy is thrilled about the opportunity for exposure, and Candace says that if they can get people to the event, the store might carry the cannolis going forward. With an understanding of what's at stake, Kathy says she'll promote the event to all of her friends and family, and Candace looks a wee bit concerned about the "family" part.

1 2 3 4 5 6Next

Real Housewives of New Jersey




Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP