Real Housewives of New Jersey
The Blonde Drops a Bombshell

Episode Report Card
Potes: B | 20 USERS: D
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Every Unhappy Family

It's then the day of Kathy's big event, and her mother Maria shows up. Kathy is hoarse in the voice, and the rest of her family has conveniently disappeared. She explains that if this event goes well, she might have opportunity to branch out to L.A. and Miami. As she curls her mom's hair, she says she called Melissa and Teresa asking them to come. Richie shows up with flowers, then Kathy gives him a whole bunch of orders. He drops her business cards on the floor, and Kathy freaks out. Victoria finally shows up, and Kathy gives her a few orders too. In this moment, she's pretty upset about the fact that her family is useless at best.

Producer and songwriter Justin Thorne and his entourage, which includes Johnny, who then show up at Melissa's house to record the aforementioned new song in her home studio. Johnny is unimpressed that she still needs the words to her songs, but she explains to us that she just got the song the previous day. Melissa is quite nervous, and Johnny pulls her off for a heart to heart. He wants her to go to his compound in Atlanta, which is a lot of time that she'd have to spend but worth it if she wants to get her vocals on par for the new song.

Kathy and family make it to Dylan's Candy Bar, and Candace is on hand to help them. Kathy is surprised that none of her extended family is there yet. We cut to Caroline's house, where she's on the couch with a migraine. She says she's disappointed that she can't attend the event at Dylan's Candy Bar, but is clearly far too ill. There's a lot of foot traffic at Dylan's, and folks have lined up to learn how to use a cannoli kit, but conspicuously absent are Kathy's family and friends. Given how those goons act in public, I think it's probably all for the best. Jacqueline and Chris show up first, and with a mouth full of frosting Jacqueline laughs that no one cares what Kathy does. Then it's dark, and finally Melissa and the kids arrive, then Rosie, then Teresa and her brood. In an interview, Teresa acknowledges that the cannolis are edible. Wow, how generous. Overall, though, the event was quite a success, and Kathy's hopes are high that the store will carry the kits.

With that, Chris, Jacqueline, Teresa and the kids head off to the autism event. Jacqueline says that this is the year where she's trying to face all of her fears, and get over things that hold her back from doing what she wants to do. (Like neck fat). I also sort of gather from context clues that this is the year where she is highly medicated. Cut to the BLK Knockout Autism event, where there are basketball hoops galore. Caroline shows up, much recovered from her worst-ever migraine. Kids run around and play basketball, while Lauren face-plants. Jacqueline, meanwhile, goes over her speech and feels nervous. She's worried about people judging her, which is the right instinct given that people are actually recapping this event with snarky intent. Chris gives her some loving encouragement, and she cries just before she goes on stage, saying that she's scared. When she goes on, she's shaky at the start, but recovers nicely and brings tears to many a mascara-caked eye. Jacqueline cries as she recounts how Nicholas stopped saying "I love you," then started again. She gets through the rest of the speech with relative confidence. She tells us that she wants to share her journey with others, as others have shared theirs with her, and hopes it can be helpful to people. Teresa has a soft spot for Nicholas, and says that if Jacqueline calls, she'll jump for Nicholas. She'll also wear bedazzled Milania hair care caps to events designed to raise autism awareness, because she is all about the cause.

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Real Housewives of New Jersey

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