Teresa is driving with my BFF Kim D., who explains to her what the solstice is and asks how things are going. Teresa immediately tells her about the clearly horrible thing she off-handedly said about Melissa to Joe and of course delusional Kim eggs her on. They get to the party, where Jacqueline's psychic, while drinking a beer (or perhaps white wine), is telling two grown women dressed as fairies to hand out bindis to the guests. The fairies, who are already visibility humiliated, decorate Teresa and Kim, and then Jacqueline, Lauren, Caroline and Melissa. They ladies are split up between two tables, Caroline tells us how much she hates Teresa, and now Kathy and Rosie are ready to party.
Within seconds, Rosie's bindi is already off, and now apparently powerless to her desires, she pulls Teresa aside and brings up the Melissa comment. Clearly the editing monkeys have very little to work with this season. Kim, meanwhile, probes Melissa about her "singing" "career," but no one can be distracted from Rosie and Teresa's conversation. They sit and we rehash things yet again, this time with Kathy at Table Melissa and Jacqueline at Table Teresa. The only interesting thing that comes out of this is Jacqueline finally saying, verbatim, "Go fucking talk to her yourself!"
Thankfully, everyone moves to one table so that Melissa and Teresa can talk about this bullcrap. Teresa whines that Joe never called her when Juicy was locked up. Melissa reiterates that Teresa denied all of the other times her family was in trouble. She then uses the world "jail," and Teresa storms off, as she cannot immediately think of how to lie her way out of this conversation, citing that she told Melissa to never use the "j" word in front of her. Kim and the psychic try to stop her from leaving, but Teresa ain't having it. I guess she will not be happy to learn that Melissa's EP this spring is ironically titled "Jailbreak My Body."
Obligatory "fun" segment: Rosie introduces herself to someone either named Jolene or Julie Anne or something with a J and a N sound and is received with a bout of 'tude. Kathy tells us Rosie doesn't have patience for airheads. Great.
Back to Teresa stomping to her car. Kim is trying to talk her down, and the ladies at the party are going over the details with Melissa yet again. Everyone is freaking out -- especially the psychic, for some reason! -- and Jacqueline walks over to Teresa, yelling at her for putting her in the middle and manipulating the situation. We hear both sides of the story, and surprisingly, Kathy is kind of with Teresa on this one -- it's kind of an old school Jersey thing, apparently, to say going "away" instead of "to jail," as a matter of pride and respect. Lauren then chimes in with another old school Jersey-ism, "If you're gonna say anything she doesn't want to hear, you have to suck on her asshole first, and then she'll listen to what it is," which I believe Deena from Jersey Shore can confirm.













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