All Mine

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B | Grade It Now!
All Mine

But there's no time to brood, because it's time for the final showdown between Evil and…Kind of Okay. At Horseshoe Court, Sam dons the jumpsuit, gas mask, etc. to smoke Bunsen out of his apartment, while Ben will keep track of the extension cord slack and JBL makes sure the cords are plugged in to one another. Of course, he gets distracted from his task when Gloria saunters up. Insert Ridiculous "JBL Tries To Be Smooth" Gag #587,886 here. Gloria asks what JBL is doing, and he suavely spills the whole plan to her. Then he attempts to ask her on a date, during which they will "launder some soiled clothing." And I don't know about you, but if Gloria opts out, sign me up! Sadly, I'll never know, because before she can answer, he tries to brush a bee off her forehead, and it sinks into her skin. Dun dun dun.

Back in the bug zone, Sam looks around for Bunsen. Ben blanches when he discovers that he's out of extension cord. Sam walks back out, and they both realize that JBL must be in peril. They run to the shed, where Gloria is pointing her stubby, bug-swarmed forearm at JBL's neck. He tells the others that he let it slip to Gloria that he's allergic to bees. She tells Sam to drop the toaster or she'll kill JBL. She snarls, "No one comes between Harold and me, not even the Devil himself!" Bad. Ass.

Just then, though, Bunsen shows up (convenient) and tells Gloria to give it up. Sam takes advantage of the distraction to tell Ben to plug the toaster back in. Bunsen admits that he wants Gloria gone and that he never actually loved her. He just dug the sex. Men… As Bunsen piles the scoundrelly revelations on Gloria, Sam tries to activate the toaster, to no avail. Then he realizes that it wasn't a toaster, but a bug zapper, and that fixing the toaster meant disabling the vessel. Gloria has now escalated from killin'-old-ladies-pissed to spittin' mad. She vows to take Bunsen to Hell with her and starts to boil over with bugs, finally spurting out a swarm of bees. As they buzz toward The Stooges and Bunsen, Sam gives the vessel one last shot. He jiggers the toaster with a coat hanger and slides it over to the swarm. It sucks all of them down in a flurry of sparks and red glow. JBL gives Bunsen some prudent advice: he shouldn't have told a crazy bitch (whom he sent to Hell) that he was only in it for the sex.

As they leave, JBL says he would totally hit it with Gloria and that her attempted him-icide only made him want her more, thus uncovering the operative dynamic in his relationship with Josie. Ben sages that it could have gone differently if Bunsen had just told Gloria the truth; instead, a bunch of people died and "he lived a miserable life." This makes Sam realize he doesn't want to live his life in misery. He sends JBL to turn in the vessel so he can tell Andi about his feelings. Sadly, this means no Gladys this week. Bah.

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