Reaper
Coming to Grips

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All Hands on Deck

Later, Sam stocks paint, but he's distracted when Andi breezes herself seductively with a fan. Taking advantage of this distraction, WiseGuy punts a soccer ball in Sam's face. Sam doubles over in pain, finding himself transported to a local park. There, WiseGuy points out three kids who are all children of a guy named Jack King, saying there are hundreds of others like them. WiseGuy explains King is a classic narcissist and points to a nearby sperm bank, where King (Javier from Felicity, holla!) assures a woman that his "product" is top-notch. And he would know... He lets the client peruse the donor book but says -- as he gazes eerily at his own reflection -- that he has someone perfect in mind.

In The Bench stockroom, JBL and Sam chat. Sam finds this week's vessel. All the while, Andi walks up to the door, stopping short when she sees the vessel transform from a harmless metal rod to a scythe in Sam's hands. JBL is, naturally, very excited for a chance to brandish a scythe à la The Highlander. (Never you mind that The Highlander didn't actually have a scythe...) Sam and JBL close up the scythe, and Andi takes the lull in scythe wielding to pick up Sam for their lunch date. Sam, now preoccupied by reap-sponsibilities, says he already ate. JBL lies that he challenged Sam to a paella-eating contest. Before a flummoxed Andi has a chance to respond, Sam says he'll make it up her and scoots.

Back at the sperm bank, JBL and Sam walk toward King's office. JBL worriedly conjectures what powers a "semen demon" might possess. Outside, Andi pulls up -- obviously unconvinced by the paella story. Inside, JBL and Sam begin the donor paperwork, with a warning from the receptionist that this bank has an extremely rigorous selection process. They have a waiting room pissing contest over their fake donor accomplishments but are interrupted when Sam sees King.

Moments later, King hears a knocking on his door. Sam pushes it open with the scythe, and King nervously tries to talk them out of sending him back to Hell. He says he was trying to make the world a better place and even despairs that he has children to think of -- hundreds of them! He backs up to the window, and Andi (still outside on her stakeout) gets a front-row view of his beheading by scythe. She peels out in horror.

Back inside, the now-headless body of King gets up and waves a golf club around while the head directs him. The prop comedy is broken up when Sam impales King with the scythe. King's still-talking head remains, and he uses his last moments on earth to ask, "How do I look?" Sam and JBL discuss what they'll have for lunch as they leave, not realizing that King's hand is skittering behind them.

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Reaper

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