Greg, Schmeg

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B | Grade It Now!
Fools in Love

Later that night, The Stooges stake out Greg's house. They decide to get it over with, and head to the trunk where JBL pulls out a shotgun. Once at the porch, Sam tries twice to load the gun, but he hasn't a clue how to do it. The kid can't even blow bubbles for Satan's sake. Are we surprised? All this ado makes Sam realize that he's not a killer and that WiseGuy is again manipulating him. They drop the whole box of ammo, making enough noise to bring Greg to the front door. He invites Sam in for a man-to-man discussion.

Inside, Greg eschews hospitality and tells Sam to walk away. He says he's got The Devil on his side, but Sam points out that WiseGuy is on no one's side. Furthermore, he informs Greg that he only made sure Andi would love him but forgot to make Andi stop loving Sam. Greg sees this huge loophole and sees that he sold his soul for nothing. He smacks himself in the head and starts recounting all the boneheaded things he's done in life. As he gets angrier, his body shakes, then starts levitating. Finally, Chainsaw McG jumps out.

As Chainsaw McG stalks toward them, Sam slips behind him and knocks him out. They pick up Greg and drag him to another room. Sam reveals to a disbelieving Greg that Chainsaw McG is his doppelganger. Chainsaw McG plows through the door and the dresser they've wedged in front as Sam tells Greg the only way to stop the spree is to calm down. Greg is so worked up, though, that it finally takes JBL knocking him out with a trophy he won...for attendance. How is everyone in this show so pathetic? The roar of the chainsaw stops.

At the hospital, Greg wakes up with a bandage around his head and Sam by his side. Greg's no longer angry -- mainly because he's doped up on morphine. Andi barges in, worried about Greg, then she sees Sam and gets the look of love in her eyes. Greg asks her to leave him alone with Sam. She exits, and he says he can feel the anger rising again, and that it's only a matter of time before the cycle begins again. It's hopeless. Sam says, "Maybe you're not as stupid as you think you are," and methinks he has an idea.

At The Bench, Dawn sees Ben and Cassidy holding hands in the food court. Ben has decided that, if she can date, so can he. Period. Dawn, backed into a corner, tells him to be discreet. Of course Tedager walks up at this moment, if for no other reason than to jack up the awkward. Tedager is indignant that Ben would treat his baby mama like this, but quick-thinking Dawn pacifies him by sidling up to Cassidy and saying that she and Ben have an "understanding" as she strokes Cassidy's hand. Before he excuses himself for, say, 20 minutes or so, Tedager bumbling tries to invite himself to the ménage.

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