Rescue Me
Guts

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Guts

Tommy gets into his truck and sighs. His cousin, Jimmy, is sitting in the passenger seat. Jimmy says that what Tommy said about him was really nice, and then adds that the probies wouldn't think Tommy was so tough if they knew he was talking to a dead guy. Tommy just glares at him. Jimmy asks what they're going to do now, and suggests going home, or perhaps going to the cemetery to stare at Jimmy's headstone again. Tommy shakes his head and starts, "You know what, Jimmy?" When he looks over, the passenger seat is empty. Tommy spits, "Asshole."

Sometimes it's hard to believe that the theme song ("C'mon, C'mon" by the Von Bondies) wasn't written specifically for the show. It's just that perfect.

The firehouse. Tommy walks in and talks to Garrity and Franco about how they are getting their new probie today, and which prank they should pull on him first. Chief Grinch (as the men refer to him) walks through and reminds Tommy that he owes the city a tour, and that if he doesn't take care of it soon, he'll be suspended. Grinch also tells Garrity to get a box from his office and bring it outside. Poor, dumb Garrity is like, "A box?" Grinch responds, "I'm in kind of a rush here. I don't have time to explain what a box is, retard. Just do it!"

After Grinch leaves, Tommy and Franco share a couple of choice epithets about him. Franco says that if the city sends a shrink over, he's going to tell them that Grinch touched him in the shower. Tommy hasn't heard about the shrinks, so Franco explains that a friend from another firehouse told him that the city sent a shrink over to talk to the guys. Tommy doesn't think too highly of that idea: "Know what I'm gonna do? If they send a shrink over here? I'm going to kick his ass." Franco thinks that might raise a red flag at headquarters.

Tommy asks Franco to switch shifts with him, because his ex-wife has a date tonight. Franco can't, because he has a thing. He says that it had better be more successful than the thing he had the night before, when he went out with "the chick with a friend." He adds that it was "goddamned disgraceful," because the chick never showed, so it was just him and the friend, "and the friend had a face like [his] ass, only [his] ass ain't as hairy." Tommy can't believe she had a hairy face. Franco says it wasn't obvious, but when she turned her head, you could see "chick sideburns." Tommy takes a moment from the conversation to tell Garrity, who's walking by with a J.C. Penney shopping bag, "That's not a box." Garrity scoffs and walks back from where he came. Franco continues his story, and says that after dinner and drinks, he made his move, and the friend blew him off. Tommy can't believe that Franco made a move on a chick with sideburns. Franco says, "It's getting slow out there. All that pussy I was getting after 9/11? Now, nothing. People forget." Tommy sympathizes, "Yeah. Sad commentary." He claps Franco on the shoulder and walks off.

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Rescue Me

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