Rescue Me

Episode Report Card
Djb: B+ | Grade It Now!

Elsewhere, Laura finds Franco, and she once again looks primed for a rumble. When Franco waves her off with a defeated "I'm not in the mood," Laura proves quickly that she is in the mood...for love. She kisses him for kind of a long time, then opens up a folded piece of paper and reads a poem. Can I not transcribe the whole thing? It's gooey love poetry that needs more tits. Will that do? I'll be your best friend. Laura smiles and tells him, "Any man that could write this has to be in love." With the healing power of Selectra XL, I'm guessing.

"Is Tommy Gavin gay now?" Sort of. He does have Harry Johns's almost identical hairstyle, after all. So asks Chief, as Garrity stares out a little window into the next room and announces, "They're dancing again." Looking forlorn, Lou pipes up, "I knew Tommy Gavin, sir. Tommy Gavin was a friend of mine. And that man out there is no Tommy Gavin." Ah, one of my very favorite cultural references of all time. How have I not been watching this show every week? Chief supposes that maybe Tommy has a disease of some kind, and Garrity asks in all seriousness if there's a type of cancer that makes you dance. And though you can hear Chief's reply coming, sirens affixed to the top of it, motoring down a wide boulevard and skipping through all of the red lights, it doesn't make it any less funny when it does come: "Dancing cancer." Goddamn. Just then, Franco bursts through the door, pointing and gesturing, "YOU." Garrity thinks he's heading right for him, but he races past Garrity and gives Lou a giant hug, announcing, "You...are my hero!" He thanks Lou profusely for writing the poem and sticking it into Laura's locker, yells a jubilant "Yes!," and takes off. Lou stands, shellshocked, until Chief approaches and asks if Lou wrote a poem. Lou shakes his head: "No." He didn't write it. He didn't put it in any locker. Not him. Then who did? Cue a whistling, fresh-faced Tommy Gavin, wiping down the rig with a rag. And whistling, whistling, whistling. Side effects may include naming that tune.

Siren! It's fire time, and the trucks go a-squealing down the city streets. They arrive at an abandoned warehouse by the water, and as they approach the front door, Lou pulls Tommy aside and asks if he wrote a poem and put it in Laura's locker. In fact, he did. Lou asks if he's even going to try and lie about it, and Tommy just reports, "Nope" because Truth Serum XL has no side effects other than not behaving at all like an actual antidepressant.

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Rescue Me




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