Revelations

Episode Report Card
Cate: C- | 458 USERS: C+
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At this rate, the world will never end

The Eklind dude is particularly effusive with his compliments as he tells Richard, "If I'd sent God a want ad, he couldn't have supplied a better man for the job." Oh, please. I've read fortune cookie messages more accurate than that. Richard is easily taken in, though, and he sticks around to hear the Eklind Foundation's theory that a nun who claimed she was impregnated by God died during a ferry accident, in which everyone onboard died except the "miracle baby" found in the sea. That would be the Miracle Satan Baby the Greek people were so happy about last week. Richard is a tad skeptical, but he does point out that a "virgin birth" could be proven through genetics. Astrophysics, you say? No, genetics. He says the genetic makeup of a baby with no father would "read like a clone." Josepha finds that remarkable, but I say it's not nearly as remarkable as the fact that these freaks at the Eklind Foundation -- which probably has more money than God -- never even thought to try consulting any medical experts before now.

There's a bit more of the convoluted arguing from Josepha, which I will skip because it's making my head hurt. But you just know that no matter how wacky her rationale, Rich is going to join her to look for Miracle Satan Baby in Greece.

ComaGirl is still moving her lips while Mother Francine says some Hail Marys. Francine claims that ComaGirl is still spouting scripture. Whoop-de-freakin'-do. Oh, and she's changed from quoting the book of Revelation to quoting the book of John. Okay, but can she tell me why Aquaman thought throwing balls of water at the bad guys while underwater would have any effect on them at all?

It looks like the show didn't have the budget for special effects to keep showing Isaiah's finger cut off, so they sent a PA down to the drugstore to get him a finger splint instead. He gets a visitor also, that surly guy who was giving the hospital administrator a hard time earlier. There's a little bit of subtitling as Isaiah and guest speak what the closed captioning calls "Saitani." Are they sure it's not Latin? Both Isaiah and his friend are peeved about Richard and Josepha getting together. They also seem to feel strongly about silencing ComaGirl. I can't imagine why. Even if she works her way through the entire Bible, it's not like she's adding any helpful interpretive commentary to the mix. Who cares if she likes to quote scripture? Isaiah acts kind of rude toward his visitor, demanding, not once but twice, "Bring me what I need!" Some sort of hallucinatory substances? The latest issue of Vogue? Don't make us guess, Isaiah. He also demands that his guest not let "Little Hawk" get away.

Revelations

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