Episode Report Card
Pablo G: B+ | 7 USERS: A+
Crashing the Stock Party.

Back on Wall Street, Bill's right-hand woman tells him the bad investment leaked and all of their investors are now pulling out. They're finished. She asks Bill what he wants to do about what's going on downstairs. "Who's downstairs?" Bill asks. "Everyone." He looks like he's about to cry.

Dec and Jack work on inventory at Poor Porter Bar. Nolans shows up to call Jack out for not returning his calls. Jack is simply never in the mood for Nolan. He walks off for a little bit and Dec takes the opportunity to explain to Nolan that Jack only sold him the boat to save the bar, and that Jack probably doesn't want to be reminded of that right now. Nolan seems genuinely perturbed at the thought of Jack doing such a thing out of financial struggle. Nolan offers Jack the boat back for free at the end of the summer if he'll simply be his friend for the season. Is anyone else creeped out by how badly Nolan specifically wants to be friends with Jack? With how rich he supposedly is, I almost expect him to offer to buy Jack's house but let him live in it just so he can pop in and be the kooky neighbor whenever he feels like it. But that's another show, I suppose. Nolan invites Jack out to a fun party he caught wind of tonight, but Jack is still reluctant. Dec can't believe Jack doesn't see how good an offer this is and insists that if Jack will go, he can close up the bar tonight in his stead. Jack finally caves. He and Nolan leave and Dec goes back to texting Charlotte to let her know he has the bar to himself tonight.

Charlotte comes home from the beach with Trust Fund Adam who's all over her, but in a semi-cute high school way. They're giggling when Charlotte stops things to remind him they're supposed to be on a break. When did that happen?! I always thought you guys were cute together. Victoria interrupts things by calling out to Charlotte from the next room. Char runs off to see what her mom wants. Adam's on his way out when Char's phone goes off with the invitation text from Dec. Trust Fund Adam becomes Distrust Fund Adam and reaches into Charlotte's purse to see who's texting her. He sees Dec's invitation and responds with this: "ur on big guy... wear something sexy!" He may be an asshole, but I gotta admit Adam really knows how to get a guy worked up. Dec closes his generic Sidekick phone, smiles to himself and runs off to put on something sexy.

Emanda and Daniel walk together on the rocks of the beach. Daniel has a picnic set up and waiting for her. They sit and talk about their family life. Daniel is really coming off like a nice guy despite his rich kid life. He has one more year of Harvard Business before he'll automatically join the board of his dad's company. Daniel asks about Emily's parents and she's very vague because they're dead. And no brothers or sisters. Again, Daniel is very sweet and suggests that now Emanda owns her own house she can maybe sprout her own roots to make up for her lack of a family. Opportunistic Emanda segues to an invitation for Daniel to come back to her house for a tour. They get back to her front porch where Emanda starts in on the cliché, "I had a good time tonight." Daniel's about to kiss her when suddenly Sammy shows up and pounces on Emanda. Jack and Nolan slide around the corner of her house after Sammy like a Scooby-Doo cartoon and are confused to find Daniel and Emanda standing there. Nolan asks if they're early or late because SURPRISE! Surprise Party Planner Ashley throws open the front door to reveal a surprise housewarming party with all of the Hamptons inside. Emanda screams on the inside.

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