Road Rules
Letting Out The True Feelings

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Kathryn applauds a Pepsi truck as it drives by. Here comes my favorite line. Theo floats up topless and says, "This is just a time to put all your potatoes in a bag and sack up." I laugh so hard that I scare both of my cats and they run around the room frantically. It was the "sack up" hand motions that killed me. Both thumbs down, pointing to your crotch. Sack up, y'all. Theo says that Kathryn was pussing out by wearing the bikini underneath the whipped cream. I guess he does have room to talk.

"TRUTH TIME" announces the Graphic of Stupid. Ann tells the group that James is going to be the first person to choose a Truth. Now, the way it works is you go to the laptop, click the index page on a Truth link, and this causes Ann to go through her notebook and read off a Truth. This new-fangled technology confuses me. Before the Truth games begin, James floats that this Truth or Dare thing is just some time for all of them to kick back, relax, have fun, and take a break from it all. Oh, James. Will you never learn? Ann asks James his Truth question. "If you could have a one-night stand with anyone on the cast, who would it be?" James fiddles with a piece of paper, tosses it aside, spins around and says, "It'd be you, Msaada," and quickly takes a drink of water from his bottle like he's confused on what Frat Game he's actually playing. Msaada laughs and wonders how she got to be the Luckiest Girl on MTV. Man, those kids can trash a hotel room. That place is a sty. Whoa, I just turned into my mother. Sorry. "Shut your hole," Msaada tells him. "Shut your hole." Theo says it's true. "I'm not kiddin'," James says. She gives him the widened-eye, "You're the saddest bastard I've ever met," smile. Oh, then she calls him a "friggin' bastard." I was close. As a cameraman ducks out of the shot, James apologizes for what he thinks. He says, "It's a gun loaded question. But if it happened, I'm a big tits and ass kind of guy," and so Msaada'd be the perfect person. A gun loaded question? Someone else ducks out of the shot while answering a cell phone. Theo jumps on the Hide-A-Way bed, tosses a cushion to the ground, and begins jumping up and down while chanting. Someone give that kid some friggin' Ritalin. James tells Msaada she was eighteen once and probably had her wild times. She gives him a "not that wild" remark and keeps grinning. Theo completely Beavises out and starts jumping on the bed, jumping from one foot to the other like he learned in Cowboy School and smacking an invisible ass while shouting, "Back to the hole," or something. What a tard. James says that even though Msaada is the Reverend's daughter, he's sure she has some "tricks in bed." This causes her to squeal. She says he's wrong.

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Road Rules

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