Here is the best commercial I've ever heard. This is from our cable company, Adelphia. "As you know, Adelphia has recently embarked on a reorganization process..." Fantastic! How wonderful that they can look on the bright side of things and spin "we've filed for bankruptcy and our founder and CEO was hauled off to jail for defrauding the company of millions of dollars" into "a reorganization process." It makes me proud to be an American. Mystikal isn't being charged with rape, by the way. He's embarking on a career redefinition process. And Robert Blake didn't kill his wife. He implemented a program of spousal heart rate deceleration.

Back. Kendal is sorry. Rachel tells her to visualize where the pin is in the tank. Someone says the bees will fall off as Darrell tells her, "You're going to touch something." Thanks, Darrell. Very helpful. All five of them are talking at the same time as she sticks her hand in. (Heh.) Rachel keeps babbling about visualization as Darrell guides her. She gets the pin and drops it like it's a penis that just spit at her, and then suddenly she's camera-talking about no longer being a pledge but a member of, oh fuck off. Sarah then tells us she's very proud of herself and she's going to "carry at torch" for New Orleans.

Now they go inside by all the photos and James wants them to repeat some stupid chant. Darrell yells it, trying to be funny, but really just making me pay more attention to the words than I'd like to. "For here today, yesterday, and tomorrow. Brothers and sisters are we. Long live Road Rules." Are they fucking kidding with that shit? And at this point I can't even tell if the kids are mocking this whole thing, or are legitimately into it. They have to be joking. James hugs them all, desperate for some more attention, then he gives them their money. And James sadly whimpers back to total obscurity from the next-door-to-total-obscurity that is being on Road Rules.