Night. ExpoDarrell tells us they get a clue on their NEXTEL DIRECT CONNECT. The recorded voice asks if they're ready for a night of hell. The kids, not yet getting yet that it's just a recording, answer. Sarah says, "No." The voice goes, "Great!" Hee. They have to be at Tulane. They all cheer mechanically, and then Darrell babbles that he's been waiting for scary shit so he can "scream like a bitch." Kendal slut-overs that she's "frightened" and that hell is not a happy place.
Day. The kids drive and Rachel gives the driving Darrell a foot job. Lots of crap editing back and forth between their faces as Shane quickly laughs a lonely laugh.
Now Rachel talks to her mom on the phone. Mom asks if she's going to call Amy and then drops the bomb like only a mom can, casually saying that Amy is dating someone. Rachel tries to act nonchalant. She's just a straight girl whose gay lover is dating someone else. It happens all the time. Now Rachel camera-talks to us that she has a girlfriend of two years -- Amy -- and that they're on a break to experience things on their blah bleh blah. Rachel then tries to come back to Mom that she's doing shit, too, so there. Rachel tells us she doesn't like to hear that Amy is with someone. Really? She hid it so well.
New Orleans. Tulane. The kids meet their Mayors, Dave and Sandi. Sandi -- with a porn-actress-smooth line reading -- Jules Asners some crap to the kids about going through the initiation to be in the Fraternal Order of Road Rules. Oh, for fuck's sake. Pul-leeze. They go to what looks like the old Real World house as Kendal voice-overs that it's a creepy house. It's so uncreepy. The only creepy thing is that B/M thought this would be creepy. That's some fucking creepy shit. Now there are photos of all the old casts and Shane says some shit about feeling honored to be part of...and I'm not even going to repeat it. Fuck you, B/M. Be ashamed of yourselves. Now they pipe in fake screaming to the track as a guy all Eyes Wide Shut in a black robe descends the stairs. I hope he trips. The kids wait, trying not to laugh, as the dude takes off his hood: It's James! From the Maximum Suckocity Tour. Hee. James. Douche. Not a single one of the kids has any fucking idea who he is. Blank looks everywhere. He has to introduce himself. Still not a flicker. Kendal camera-talks that James is "creepy," but that he's too cute to be really scary. Yeah. Back off, sister! That's Theo's man.