Road Rules
Surfing To Goodbye

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No Time Is a Good Time for Goodbyes

If last week's rant about reality-show cast members being very stupid and naïve in thinking this is a good way to launch a career in the performing arts afterward -- based on, if nothing else, looking at the sea of non-careers launched before you by The Real World-ers and Survivors and The Molemen -- if that upset anyone, I have to say: good. It's about time. Have Eric Nies hand you a hanky and get back to filing and answering phones.

Previously...Sarah told us she doesn't do well at missions. We saw her failing them. Computer screen. They had to make a decision. Sarah told us that last time, everyone did her a favor by not booting her. Then they voted. The boys all voted to vote. Kendal made her stupid speech. Then the vote was tied. The B/M Crack Editing squad has obviously been told to try to make that section seem very very exciting and tense. I wonder why they're bothering? Maybe the show is huge in Guam or something.

Opening credits. I refuse. (It's great that they still haven't fixed the lyric on the closed captioning. "Just board the camper." Not even close. Hee.)

Night. Stock footage of the full moon. RV. Dramatic shots and fade-outs of the kids. Rachel tells us they knew they'd someday have to make this choice. Shane amps up the drama by telling us, "This is someone's life." Oh, for the love of the big gay god. This is not someone's life. It's a stupid game show. Relax, yo. Shane tells Sarah that he wants to hear what she has to say. Oh, thanks. Sarah -- all teary and snotty as always -- says that it seems that a lot of problems would be gone if they just booted her. Then she says maybe not; maybe the new girl would be just like her and they'd be "fucked." Everyone laughs too eagerly, the tension-breaking laugh of "Oh god. Now that you cracked a joke, we don't feel quite as bad booting you, since you're obviously not suicidal." Eric jumps on it, voting once again to vote. Kendal slut-overs that Eric voted so quickly and didn't even think; if he cared about her he'd think about what she'd said and consider it. Darrell votes to boot. Shane does, too. Kendal isn't changing her vote. Rachel babbles that she's confused. She tells Sarah she doesn't know if Sarah quite grasps why they're making this decision. Oh, shut up. Of course she does. Don't blame being a cunt on the person you're booting. Just boot or not. She finally says she's not ready to lose anyone else at random, and votes to boot.

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Road Rules

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