Road Rules
The Woodie Crawl

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What Bright Side?

Eric, Shane, and Kendal are sitting up front. Kendal -- looking really pretty -- tells the boys that she doesn't know why, but she called her ex-boyfriend last night. Aw, drunk-calling after dancing with Eric. You know, Eric is very much an All-American boy, in that he really wants to have a threesome. Difference is, he wants it with to be with Kendal and Shane. Eric looks bummed as Kendal says that she doesn't know why she called him. "He gets in my head," she says. (I'll leave that one alone, people. Too easy.) She tells us -- as we see a video of her standing with the least memorable boy I've ever seen -- that she doesn't know how they broke up, but she fell too hard too fast and doesn't have the energy to get involved on that level right now with anyone. Eric drives on, pissed, as Kendal secretly laughs that she's fucking with him. Shane camera-talks as much to us. We see them at dinner; Eric is flirting stupidly with Kendal and she calls him a dork. He, "hurt," moves to another seat. Then Eric's big stupid face is telling us that Kendal has fucked more people that he has (consensually, he means), and that he doesn't know what "level [he needs] to play to." Hee. I'm still having the great Tool or Douchebag debate with Eric. I'm thinking Tool, but the jury is still out. Rachel, meanwhile, sticks her nose in other people's business (sorry) and tells us that Eric will get played by Kendal -- and that she has "too many scars" for him. (Just say, "Too many dicks," Rachel. It's okay. We're all adults.)

In the RV, the kids decide where to sleep and volunteer Eric to sleep alone in back. Kendal says that's fine, because they're not sleeping together. Eric asks why, and she whispers that they already discussed that. Poor Eric. He asks for clarification and Sarah (I think) busts in, "He just wants to cuddle, kiss, and dry-hump." Hee. Everyone laughs. Lord, this is going on and on. Kendal tells us she's purposefully going hot and cold on Eric. Yes, because she's a woman and that's what they do. Well it is. Commercials.

The five decide to go out running on some rural road. They ask Sarah one more time if she wants to come, but she says no. Fuck, I wouldn't either. She says it's too hot, and then tells us that the other five are very competitive, but she'd rather sit around eating chips. Word. Fuck jogging. The kids are walking now, saying that they don't know what to do with her and they're frustrated and she needs to just get out of the RV because she stays in there all day. Eric says they do have missions coming up and it would be good if she was used to being active. Rachel tells us that obviously Sarah is getting the boot if they have to boot someone. Well, yeah. I could have told you that two days ago. Back at the RV, Sarah tells the kids she started a diary on the computer; she jokes that they shouldn't go read it cuz it's private. (God, that was the stupidest thing to do -- start a diary on the computer while everyone already hates you, and then tell them not to look. Yeah, that request will be honored.) Rachel says that Sarah must already be getting herself prepared for the Big Boot. Shane blahs about not knowing if Sarah wants to be part of their team.

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Road Rules

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